Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
Feeling Sad---Son is Homeless
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Feeling Sad" data-source="post: 663312" data-attributes="member: 19245"><p>I need to have hope to get through this. I know that "many wander the streets alone and homeless and hallucinating". I already am extremely aware of the large numbers of unfortunate homeless mentally ill people...about 1/3. That is my biggest fear. I already think about that EVERY moment of every day. Yes, some do get help. I need to hold onto that.</p><p></p><p>That is why I never kicked him out before, but with the command hallucinations, it was very necessary. He was homeless 10 years ago for a year in a different state because he came home and saw me in his room due to flooding. I thought that I was going to go crazy with worry.</p><p></p><p>They do not always follow their command hallucinations, but my sister set a dress on fire in our house that my mother just sewed for her, ran full force into the glass slider, and jumped from a 2 story balcony at the mental hospital because she was following command hallucinations. They do not always follow them, but they can. </p><p></p><p>My son was talking to his voices as he destroyed the tablet, as well as, many other things. He was crying and pleading with his voices in his room to come back a week before this happened. It broke my heart. When their voices are seen as friendly or powerful, they have a greater liklihood of complying.</p><p></p><p>The head of NAMI in my town filed a restraining order. Many people in NAMI have. After his son was arrested 3 times, he was finally brought in because he was acting strangely at a mall and scaring people. He then got help and is doing fine now with medications. Almost all of the many similar cases through NAMI see their adult children now after filing a restraining order. I only know of one case where her son is choosing to be homeless for the last 8 years. He is still in our smaller town and she knows how he is doing from the shelter and the police. He calls and she is still refusing to give him money.</p><p></p><p>Both of my therapists, I see each weekly right now, worked at hospitals and were the ones that would evaluate people brought in for strange behavior and then would have the hospital psychiatrist come in and evaluate them, if warranted. They both say that he will surface. One said that it was ridiculous to think that I will never see him again. Yes, I might not, and that is the main thought that is crippling me. </p><p></p><p>Even if he is brought in, he might run off again after treatment. The treatment is usually only 72 hours. Yes, he can refuse medications. I was hoping that he would act strange or run and qualify for a 5150 that day the crisis team came to my house. I was down the street praying for that. He had 6 days to come up with a story and did not meet the criteria of being a threat to himself, a threat to others, or gravely disabled. I was hoping that with medications, he would have insight into his illness.</p><p></p><p>My middle sister, who became paranoid schizophrenic at age 13, was young and my parents were her guardians. She was on medications and constantly in and out of hospitals her whole life. She was kidnapped by a pimp when she was 21 and was forced to turn tricks for 2 weeks in a seedy hotel until she was found. He had told her, when she got on the wrong bus that went downtown, that she was not allowed to be on a bus after dark. She believed him. She still talked about him constantly until she passed away last year at age 63.</p><p></p><p>My biggest fear is that someone will take advantage or hurt my son because he is not thinking clearly and is child-like in many ways. I am a special education teacher and I see general education students teasing and bullying special education students.</p><p></p><p>My eldest sister had a late onset of paranoid schizophrenia, at 50. I got her into a 14 day hold because she had driven onto the exit of a freeway in her rush to get to the library to research about something she had inside her...she thought. They let her go after just 72 hours. I was told that there is no law against being crazy. She just threw away her pills and is still mentally ill with delusions. She is also very mad at me.</p><p></p><p>Yes, it is legal to be mentally ill, but people call the police if their behavior is scaring them...not just for violence. They will see the missing persons report and the long file on threatening behavior on him I was told to give the police. Hopefully, they will then have enough information for a 72 hour hold. </p><p></p><p>Also, some do get help on their own because they are tired of being on the streets or of being ill. My therapists insist that they still possess some insight into their life. My friend's brother accepted treatment because he was tired of living on the streets for 2 years.</p><p></p><p>My therapists think that it is ridiculous to think that I will never see him again. Yes, I know very well that there are no guarantees. My youngest son will be contacted if he is brought in for scary behavior or he is arrested for vagrancy, etc. Also they saw people come into their hospitals on their own volition for help. </p><p></p><p>My best friend's brother was not homeless, but went in the hospital voluntarily because he knew he couldn't stand it anymore. Sadly, he is off the medications now and back to being paranoid. Only 20% of schizophrenic patient are still on medications after 2 years. Sad statistic.</p><p></p><p>I have to hope that he is getting offered help at the shelter. Maybe just a rapport is slowly being established. I was surprised that he even went there. He is very afraid of people having paranoid schizophrenia. I guess his desire to take showers over rode his fears...</p><p></p><p>I need to have hope that he will get help eventually or I will completely fall apart. I never have before, but I feel very fragile right now. I do not sleep very well and continue to lose weight. Yes, I needed to lose weight, but it is too quick and a lot.</p><p></p><p>Unfortunately, I live in California, where you cannot just kick out your child. You have to have an official eviction or a restraining order. An eviction would take over 45 days. I could not have afforded staying in a hotel that long. My house would have been destroyed. My youngest son's and my vacation was that 6 day stay at a hotel in town while getting a restraining order and getting the best mental health crisis team in place. That was the only time he had off from work and college.</p><p></p><p>I know that everyone feels that I did the only thing that I could do to keep my youngest son safe. I have to have hope, not Pollyanna hope, not gloom and doom hope, but somewhere in the middle or I will not be able to work or be strong for my youngest son.</p><p></p><p>I am going to continue with the thought that I not only saved my youngest son and myself...but him, too. He refused treatment here for 9 years. He would throw a fully loaded table across the room, spat in my face, kicked furniture in, stabbed the kitched counter and cqbinets, and squirted hot sauce all over the ceilings, walls, and furniture, etc. if I even tried to talk to him about seeing a doctor. He was not going to get better here while I was being 'held hostage' by his violence.</p><p></p><p>I have a much higher tolerance to violence because I shared a room with my schizophrenic sister growing up from age 11. I turned my drawers around, roped off my closest, and tried to glue the folding wall shut, to no avail. She would threaten me with a knife or scissors. She ruled the roost. I also am a special education teacher. I live it daily.</p><p></p><p>I need to have hope...middle of the road...hope.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Feeling Sad, post: 663312, member: 19245"] I need to have hope to get through this. I know that "many wander the streets alone and homeless and hallucinating". I already am extremely aware of the large numbers of unfortunate homeless mentally ill people...about 1/3. That is my biggest fear. I already think about that EVERY moment of every day. Yes, some do get help. I need to hold onto that. That is why I never kicked him out before, but with the command hallucinations, it was very necessary. He was homeless 10 years ago for a year in a different state because he came home and saw me in his room due to flooding. I thought that I was going to go crazy with worry. They do not always follow their command hallucinations, but my sister set a dress on fire in our house that my mother just sewed for her, ran full force into the glass slider, and jumped from a 2 story balcony at the mental hospital because she was following command hallucinations. They do not always follow them, but they can. My son was talking to his voices as he destroyed the tablet, as well as, many other things. He was crying and pleading with his voices in his room to come back a week before this happened. It broke my heart. When their voices are seen as friendly or powerful, they have a greater liklihood of complying. The head of NAMI in my town filed a restraining order. Many people in NAMI have. After his son was arrested 3 times, he was finally brought in because he was acting strangely at a mall and scaring people. He then got help and is doing fine now with medications. Almost all of the many similar cases through NAMI see their adult children now after filing a restraining order. I only know of one case where her son is choosing to be homeless for the last 8 years. He is still in our smaller town and she knows how he is doing from the shelter and the police. He calls and she is still refusing to give him money. Both of my therapists, I see each weekly right now, worked at hospitals and were the ones that would evaluate people brought in for strange behavior and then would have the hospital psychiatrist come in and evaluate them, if warranted. They both say that he will surface. One said that it was ridiculous to think that I will never see him again. Yes, I might not, and that is the main thought that is crippling me. Even if he is brought in, he might run off again after treatment. The treatment is usually only 72 hours. Yes, he can refuse medications. I was hoping that he would act strange or run and qualify for a 5150 that day the crisis team came to my house. I was down the street praying for that. He had 6 days to come up with a story and did not meet the criteria of being a threat to himself, a threat to others, or gravely disabled. I was hoping that with medications, he would have insight into his illness. My middle sister, who became paranoid schizophrenic at age 13, was young and my parents were her guardians. She was on medications and constantly in and out of hospitals her whole life. She was kidnapped by a pimp when she was 21 and was forced to turn tricks for 2 weeks in a seedy hotel until she was found. He had told her, when she got on the wrong bus that went downtown, that she was not allowed to be on a bus after dark. She believed him. She still talked about him constantly until she passed away last year at age 63. My biggest fear is that someone will take advantage or hurt my son because he is not thinking clearly and is child-like in many ways. I am a special education teacher and I see general education students teasing and bullying special education students. My eldest sister had a late onset of paranoid schizophrenia, at 50. I got her into a 14 day hold because she had driven onto the exit of a freeway in her rush to get to the library to research about something she had inside her...she thought. They let her go after just 72 hours. I was told that there is no law against being crazy. She just threw away her pills and is still mentally ill with delusions. She is also very mad at me. Yes, it is legal to be mentally ill, but people call the police if their behavior is scaring them...not just for violence. They will see the missing persons report and the long file on threatening behavior on him I was told to give the police. Hopefully, they will then have enough information for a 72 hour hold. Also, some do get help on their own because they are tired of being on the streets or of being ill. My therapists insist that they still possess some insight into their life. My friend's brother accepted treatment because he was tired of living on the streets for 2 years. My therapists think that it is ridiculous to think that I will never see him again. Yes, I know very well that there are no guarantees. My youngest son will be contacted if he is brought in for scary behavior or he is arrested for vagrancy, etc. Also they saw people come into their hospitals on their own volition for help. My best friend's brother was not homeless, but went in the hospital voluntarily because he knew he couldn't stand it anymore. Sadly, he is off the medications now and back to being paranoid. Only 20% of schizophrenic patient are still on medications after 2 years. Sad statistic. I have to hope that he is getting offered help at the shelter. Maybe just a rapport is slowly being established. I was surprised that he even went there. He is very afraid of people having paranoid schizophrenia. I guess his desire to take showers over rode his fears... I need to have hope that he will get help eventually or I will completely fall apart. I never have before, but I feel very fragile right now. I do not sleep very well and continue to lose weight. Yes, I needed to lose weight, but it is too quick and a lot. Unfortunately, I live in California, where you cannot just kick out your child. You have to have an official eviction or a restraining order. An eviction would take over 45 days. I could not have afforded staying in a hotel that long. My house would have been destroyed. My youngest son's and my vacation was that 6 day stay at a hotel in town while getting a restraining order and getting the best mental health crisis team in place. That was the only time he had off from work and college. I know that everyone feels that I did the only thing that I could do to keep my youngest son safe. I have to have hope, not Pollyanna hope, not gloom and doom hope, but somewhere in the middle or I will not be able to work or be strong for my youngest son. I am going to continue with the thought that I not only saved my youngest son and myself...but him, too. He refused treatment here for 9 years. He would throw a fully loaded table across the room, spat in my face, kicked furniture in, stabbed the kitched counter and cqbinets, and squirted hot sauce all over the ceilings, walls, and furniture, etc. if I even tried to talk to him about seeing a doctor. He was not going to get better here while I was being 'held hostage' by his violence. I have a much higher tolerance to violence because I shared a room with my schizophrenic sister growing up from age 11. I turned my drawers around, roped off my closest, and tried to glue the folding wall shut, to no avail. She would threaten me with a knife or scissors. She ruled the roost. I also am a special education teacher. I live it daily. I need to have hope...middle of the road...hope. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
Feeling Sad---Son is Homeless
Top