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Feeling Sad---Son is Homeless
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 707931" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>I have never read you so clear about the situation. What you write is like an Escher drawing. Interconnected chaos in which you have no role, but everything at stake. The only thing to do, either look away or submit to the chaos. To keep trying to figure it out, I can see, is to keep constructing the net in which you are caught.</p><p></p><p>You may well not believe this Feeling, but when things began to change for me was when I prayed. I had never prayed before and did not know how to pray. But I have told you that I speak with a Rabbi most weeks now, for spiritual direction.</p><p></p><p>I kept saying: I want...I need. Realizing all the while that I had no control and that my attempts to control were worsening the situation making me more desperate and my son more angry.</p><p></p><p>So instead of I want I said: Please g-d, let him be safe. Please g-d let him live. Or something to that effect.</p><p></p><p>This must have calmed me so that I allowed space in the universe for what would happen to manifest. And it did.</p><p></p><p>The rabbi is telling me that I am changing paradigms. I can see this in so many ways, most of which I do not understand.</p><p>This makes sense to me. I wonder if on some level he feels with you in a similar way you feel with him.</p><p></p><p>Take care and I am glad you checked in.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 707931, member: 18958"] I have never read you so clear about the situation. What you write is like an Escher drawing. Interconnected chaos in which you have no role, but everything at stake. The only thing to do, either look away or submit to the chaos. To keep trying to figure it out, I can see, is to keep constructing the net in which you are caught. You may well not believe this Feeling, but when things began to change for me was when I prayed. I had never prayed before and did not know how to pray. But I have told you that I speak with a Rabbi most weeks now, for spiritual direction. I kept saying: I want...I need. Realizing all the while that I had no control and that my attempts to control were worsening the situation making me more desperate and my son more angry. So instead of I want I said: Please g-d, let him be safe. Please g-d let him live. Or something to that effect. This must have calmed me so that I allowed space in the universe for what would happen to manifest. And it did. The rabbi is telling me that I am changing paradigms. I can see this in so many ways, most of which I do not understand. This makes sense to me. I wonder if on some level he feels with you in a similar way you feel with him. Take care and I am glad you checked in. [/QUOTE]
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