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Feeling Sad---Son is Homeless
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 713056" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p><strong>Feeling</strong>. Hi. I am glad middle son is home and glad he is perking up. There is a book called <u>When bad things happen to good people.</u> By Rabbi Kushner. He had a mentally retarded son and could not accept this and it called into question his faith. Thus the book. The rabbi I speak to does not agree with R. Kushner's conclusions, but I mention the book because it demonstrates how central are in our culture the questions you have posed.</p><p></p><p>I know that the question of <em>why</em> is central to me. And I deal with it by blaming myself. If so much bad has happened to me and around me, and I am the common denominator, it must be my fault. I must be the evil one, even though I am not. Except the thing is there is a little evil in everybody, just as there is the potential for good in evil. To blame oneself for what happened over which one had no control is wrong and hurtful</p><p></p><p>I am not saying this to be abstract. I am saying this because I believe it is wrong for us to torture ourselves for what happened. That is what middle son is doing to himself and what we do, too. We need to stop.</p><p></p><p>I have said before I believe you will see your son. I believe he has a strong will to live and to survive. He is smart. Brilliant.</p><p></p><p>There is always the potential for something unexpected to happen to change everything. We are geared up to expect the worst. But it can go the other way.</p><p></p><p>I do not know how and what. But I believe he is OK. It has been 2 years. The hardest part for him and for you is past. He is doing this. He stays in the fight because of you. The strength and the love you gave him gave him, instilled the capacity and want to do so.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 713056, member: 18958"] [B]Feeling[/B]. Hi. I am glad middle son is home and glad he is perking up. There is a book called [U]When bad things happen to good people.[/U] By Rabbi Kushner. He had a mentally retarded son and could not accept this and it called into question his faith. Thus the book. The rabbi I speak to does not agree with R. Kushner's conclusions, but I mention the book because it demonstrates how central are in our culture the questions you have posed. I know that the question of [I]why[/I] is central to me. And I deal with it by blaming myself. If so much bad has happened to me and around me, and I am the common denominator, it must be my fault. I must be the evil one, even though I am not. Except the thing is there is a little evil in everybody, just as there is the potential for good in evil. To blame oneself for what happened over which one had no control is wrong and hurtful I am not saying this to be abstract. I am saying this because I believe it is wrong for us to torture ourselves for what happened. That is what middle son is doing to himself and what we do, too. We need to stop. I have said before I believe you will see your son. I believe he has a strong will to live and to survive. He is smart. Brilliant. There is always the potential for something unexpected to happen to change everything. We are geared up to expect the worst. But it can go the other way. I do not know how and what. But I believe he is OK. It has been 2 years. The hardest part for him and for you is past. He is doing this. He stays in the fight because of you. The strength and the love you gave him gave him, instilled the capacity and want to do so. [/QUOTE]
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