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Parent Emeritus
Feeling strong-armed by your loved one?
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<blockquote data-quote="AHF" data-source="post: 409709" data-attributes="member: 11180"><p>I'm not talking about ignoring someone for 25 years. I'm responding to the Q of whether you throw him or her out on his or her fanny. To the Q of "What if he dies because I did this?", I am trying--with little success--to convince myself that at the age of 21, my difficult child is not going to die because of something I do or fail to do. That all of his choices are leading him somewhere, and that I can have as much patience as humanly possible. But that exercising that patience to (for instance) continue to house and feed a slothful abuser while hoping that therapy and medications and the maturing brain will combine to kick him into gear at age 26 may NOT be the most helpful or risk-free decision. I'm not criticizing anything anyone else is doing. I'm just noting that while the brain may mature late, habits are formed early. If all the positive stuff we do doesn't change those habits, then the risky, negative, door in the face may be either a) the best thing, or b) an unnecessary and painful step that could've been avoided if we'd just stayed the course until the kid "grew up."</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="AHF, post: 409709, member: 11180"] I'm not talking about ignoring someone for 25 years. I'm responding to the Q of whether you throw him or her out on his or her fanny. To the Q of "What if he dies because I did this?", I am trying--with little success--to convince myself that at the age of 21, my difficult child is not going to die because of something I do or fail to do. That all of his choices are leading him somewhere, and that I can have as much patience as humanly possible. But that exercising that patience to (for instance) continue to house and feed a slothful abuser while hoping that therapy and medications and the maturing brain will combine to kick him into gear at age 26 may NOT be the most helpful or risk-free decision. I'm not criticizing anything anyone else is doing. I'm just noting that while the brain may mature late, habits are formed early. If all the positive stuff we do doesn't change those habits, then the risky, negative, door in the face may be either a) the best thing, or b) an unnecessary and painful step that could've been avoided if we'd just stayed the course until the kid "grew up." [/QUOTE]
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Feeling strong-armed by your loved one?
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