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feeling very hopeless
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<blockquote data-quote="CactusK" data-source="post: 376283"><p>Hi everyone. Thanks for the replies. It's been a rough couple of weeks- and I'm still figuring out how to navigate the site. My difficult child had 4 tantrums in a row that bad week. He's seen the counselor once; had a good time playing, and is eager to return. We are anxiously awaiting some input from her - on how to handle him.</p><p>I have been reading "The Explosive Child". It seems to fit my difficult child to a T. The thing is that Plan B seems to annoy him, and he wanders out of the room. It does defuse the situation, and I've also used it on my easy child.</p><p>I loved the "Love and Logic" book. Will try to get husband to read it. He is on a downward spiral with his mood. At this point we are just people raising two children together. He says the most rude, unkind things to me and I hate for my kids to see and hear it. And we are in counselling. At one point she almost fired us because nothing was changing. husband is pretty out of touch with reality and I probably need to do some video taping so he can watch us all together.</p><p></p><p>I have decided that my son is not defiant because we are not on the same page. He has issues because for some reason- prenatal substance abuse, genetics, whatever- he has issues. However, the dissension is tearing us apart. husband gets angry and upset and never gets "over it." He's been in a funk most of the time for the last 3 years.</p><p>Apparently his Mom let his Dad do the discipline (wait until Dad gets home) and Dad didn't do anything.</p><p></p><p>The funny thing is that generally difficult child's mood is better- though he flies off the handle faster these days.</p><p></p><p>My psychiatrist things difficult child needs to be medicated so we are safe at home. husband won't hear of it. I thought most kids were medicated at school, but our difficult child seems to keep it together until he gets home- then rants about being bored and provokes his sister. So far our solution is to put him in the school's "aftercare" which he loves, on the days when he doesn't have after-school activities.</p><p>Sorry if I rambled, didn't sleep well last night.</p><p>me, 53</p><p>husband 55</p><p>difficult child 8</p><p>easy child, girl, age 5 just became a client of the "House Fairy"</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="CactusK, post: 376283"] Hi everyone. Thanks for the replies. It's been a rough couple of weeks- and I'm still figuring out how to navigate the site. My difficult child had 4 tantrums in a row that bad week. He's seen the counselor once; had a good time playing, and is eager to return. We are anxiously awaiting some input from her - on how to handle him. I have been reading "The Explosive Child". It seems to fit my difficult child to a T. The thing is that Plan B seems to annoy him, and he wanders out of the room. It does defuse the situation, and I've also used it on my easy child. I loved the "Love and Logic" book. Will try to get husband to read it. He is on a downward spiral with his mood. At this point we are just people raising two children together. He says the most rude, unkind things to me and I hate for my kids to see and hear it. And we are in counselling. At one point she almost fired us because nothing was changing. husband is pretty out of touch with reality and I probably need to do some video taping so he can watch us all together. I have decided that my son is not defiant because we are not on the same page. He has issues because for some reason- prenatal substance abuse, genetics, whatever- he has issues. However, the dissension is tearing us apart. husband gets angry and upset and never gets "over it." He's been in a funk most of the time for the last 3 years. Apparently his Mom let his Dad do the discipline (wait until Dad gets home) and Dad didn't do anything. The funny thing is that generally difficult child's mood is better- though he flies off the handle faster these days. My psychiatrist things difficult child needs to be medicated so we are safe at home. husband won't hear of it. I thought most kids were medicated at school, but our difficult child seems to keep it together until he gets home- then rants about being bored and provokes his sister. So far our solution is to put him in the school's "aftercare" which he loves, on the days when he doesn't have after-school activities. Sorry if I rambled, didn't sleep well last night. me, 53 husband 55 difficult child 8 easy child, girl, age 5 just became a client of the "House Fairy" [/QUOTE]
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