I think finding acceptance within yourself is difficult for anyone. But when you add all of the challenges that you are facing, it is understandable why you are struggling with this. To me, your post sounded overwhelmed with feelings. I think maybe one of the first places to start is to acknowledge those feelings, validate them, and accept them as how you feel right now. Have yourself a good cry if you need to. And then, breath. Put those feelings on a shelf for a time and do something good for you, find something you enjoy or are proud of, and do it. No matter how small it is, it will help.
I think sometimes, especially as women, we fight feeling bad or sad, like we don't deserve to feel that way. Part of finding acceptance is accepting how you feel at this moment in time. Once you do that, you can work on feeling better, and you also won't be fighting against yourself anymore. Life is a journey, you can fight against that journey and the feelings that come with it, or you can go with the path and the feelings-whatever they are, and find joy in what you can.
I don't know if any of this is helpful. I hope it is, if it's not well then know that at least you are in my thoughts!
Michelle
