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I know what else I wanted to say....

I'm a fixer.  That's what I do.  I can't fix this.  At least not by myself.  At least with the depression, there were things *I* could - and did - do to fix myself.  So, I'm at a loss.  I think that's part of what makes me feel so pathetic.  That I don't know how to fix this.

Just more rambling....