StressBunny,
Yes, I have abandoned the hw battles with my difficult child. We stopped fighting that battle when my difficult child was in the first grade. We did get it written into his IEP that hw not be an expectation. If he is up to it we will help, otherwise we refuse to do the battle. He used to get violent over hw and it just wasn't worth it.
by the way, that seems like a lot of hw for a first grader-that is what I expect out of my 4th and 5th graders-about 45 min. per night.
Welcome to a fellow Wisconsinite!
