Good evening. I feel your pain. Yes, I too abandoned the homework battle, not every night, as it was dependent on N's mood, but often enough. HW is a school issue and in my opinion should be dealt with at school. I let the teachers know that I was not going to allow HW to ruin our family life and if N's work was not done, they needed to handle it however they saw fit, with the understanding that N is ADHD and ODD. Daily after school N and J were expected to sit down and start homework (after snack and short play time). Somedays went fine and others were a disaster. If N chose not to cooperate, then she went to their room until J was done. Then life went on as usual and any consequence was handled by the teacher. It did not solve the problem of finishing the HW, but it eased the problems at home.
Hope this helps and hugs to you.
Naomi
