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First time on here .... Eeeekkk
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<blockquote data-quote="UKMummy" data-source="post: 676384" data-attributes="member: 19939"><p>Thank you,so much for your posts. I couldn't sleep, so I got up with a coffee and read these. The relief of knowing you all get it is so good for me. I have wonderful friends, many who have known me for many years and have known my son from birth. Nobody tells me I am doing anything wrong BUT I FEEL some judgement. Especially from my sister who he lives with. </p><p>I am going to work on the guilt. It needs to go. I don't know what to say to my son. I can't carry on listening to his 'woe is me' stories, only for him to tell me he doesn't want my advice. Maybe a 'you'll figure it out' conversation would be better. He has this way of muting me that no one else has. Master manipulator. He's had a lot of practise.</p><p>I have booked a holiday for the summer with my 2 other children. Eldest is paying for herself. 16 yo I'm paying for obviously. As soon as I booked it the anxiety starts. How am I going to tell him? Shall I invite him even though he does not get on at all with his siblings. He would have to pay for himself and that is never going to happen! He will be so angry and jealous. But I want to go away with my family. Daughter is graduating form a top uni and youngest is finishing school. We have such a good time together and he is not there. My daughter says she is glad he left at 16 because it gave the rest of us a chance to have a happy home and normal relationships. It's true and that's so sad. Not that he sees it like that. He was kicked out. I'm the worst mother in the world and he life is bad beach use of me. I KNOW that's not true and now it's time to start believing it. </p><p>I need to message him and I dread it. I have to steel myself for every contact. </p><p>Thank you guys - have a peaceful day.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="UKMummy, post: 676384, member: 19939"] Thank you,so much for your posts. I couldn't sleep, so I got up with a coffee and read these. The relief of knowing you all get it is so good for me. I have wonderful friends, many who have known me for many years and have known my son from birth. Nobody tells me I am doing anything wrong BUT I FEEL some judgement. Especially from my sister who he lives with. I am going to work on the guilt. It needs to go. I don't know what to say to my son. I can't carry on listening to his 'woe is me' stories, only for him to tell me he doesn't want my advice. Maybe a 'you'll figure it out' conversation would be better. He has this way of muting me that no one else has. Master manipulator. He's had a lot of practise. I have booked a holiday for the summer with my 2 other children. Eldest is paying for herself. 16 yo I'm paying for obviously. As soon as I booked it the anxiety starts. How am I going to tell him? Shall I invite him even though he does not get on at all with his siblings. He would have to pay for himself and that is never going to happen! He will be so angry and jealous. But I want to go away with my family. Daughter is graduating form a top uni and youngest is finishing school. We have such a good time together and he is not there. My daughter says she is glad he left at 16 because it gave the rest of us a chance to have a happy home and normal relationships. It's true and that's so sad. Not that he sees it like that. He was kicked out. I'm the worst mother in the world and he life is bad beach use of me. I KNOW that's not true and now it's time to start believing it. I need to message him and I dread it. I have to steel myself for every contact. Thank you guys - have a peaceful day. [/QUOTE]
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