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Parent Emeritus
First time posting, son 31, heroin addict, living at home, sober and stable for months, then not
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<blockquote data-quote="PattyK" data-source="post: 730627" data-attributes="member: 22937"><p>Copobanana, thank you for your comments. You and everyone else posting are telling me what I know to be true. I must find the courage, determination and wisdom to move forward in a way that is in his best interest. And I know that is learning to be on his own and conquering his demons himself. Anything less handicaps him - infantasize as you said. </p><p></p><p>I would love to see him go to teen challenge. His highschool girlfriend did and continues to thrive. But he does not want to give up his life for a year (thats how he sees it). </p><p></p><p>I feel i need to come up with a plan that lovingly invites him to leave. Give him some time instead of just kicking him out with no warning. He’s not making us miserable right now except he’s unemployed and historically spends every penny he makes (on himself, not his bills) I don’t see that changing. So whats a reasonable plan? I would appreciate some suggestions as to how others have done it. </p><p></p><p>I know that my own fears and issues have brought us all to this place as much as his. My husband and I have allowed it. I have to be willing to face my fears and pain and grow. </p><p></p><p>What is a reasonable amount of time to give him? Do I collect names and numbers of resources such as NAMI, MHMR, teen challenge, homeless shelters, etc and once the day comes wish him well and send him on his way - or just send him on his way and leave him to discover any agencies that might help?</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="PattyK, post: 730627, member: 22937"] Copobanana, thank you for your comments. You and everyone else posting are telling me what I know to be true. I must find the courage, determination and wisdom to move forward in a way that is in his best interest. And I know that is learning to be on his own and conquering his demons himself. Anything less handicaps him - infantasize as you said. I would love to see him go to teen challenge. His highschool girlfriend did and continues to thrive. But he does not want to give up his life for a year (thats how he sees it). I feel i need to come up with a plan that lovingly invites him to leave. Give him some time instead of just kicking him out with no warning. He’s not making us miserable right now except he’s unemployed and historically spends every penny he makes (on himself, not his bills) I don’t see that changing. So whats a reasonable plan? I would appreciate some suggestions as to how others have done it. I know that my own fears and issues have brought us all to this place as much as his. My husband and I have allowed it. I have to be willing to face my fears and pain and grow. What is a reasonable amount of time to give him? Do I collect names and numbers of resources such as NAMI, MHMR, teen challenge, homeless shelters, etc and once the day comes wish him well and send him on his way - or just send him on his way and leave him to discover any agencies that might help? [/QUOTE]
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First time posting, son 31, heroin addict, living at home, sober and stable for months, then not
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