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<blockquote data-quote="overcome mom" data-source="post: 753761" data-attributes="member: 23328"><p>Calgary Mom. I know exactly how you feel, I do the same thing . I play all the different scenarios in my head of what could go wrong what he should do. I was just going through my computer organizing and started to read through a bunch of things that related to my son. Letters to schools, judges, counselors and to him while he was in treatment, or jail .It hit me like a brick that nothing really has changed, that no matter what we have done or the terrible things he has put himself through have changed his behavior. He seems to have gotten a little better controlling his temper but in some ways I wonder if he has just become a better manipulator. I too have felt the guilt for a long time but I am getting over it. Since he has been out of the house things have been a bit better. Even now when I go on vacation it helps relive some of the worry as , I still dread the phone calls asking for money. I guess I feel I have an excuse not to answer my phone not that I should need one. I always hope for the best but am trying to be realistic that he may never change much . I am 64 and I don't want my last years full of constant worry,fear and concern that over takes me and makes me unable to find joy in my life.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="overcome mom, post: 753761, member: 23328"] Calgary Mom. I know exactly how you feel, I do the same thing . I play all the different scenarios in my head of what could go wrong what he should do. I was just going through my computer organizing and started to read through a bunch of things that related to my son. Letters to schools, judges, counselors and to him while he was in treatment, or jail .It hit me like a brick that nothing really has changed, that no matter what we have done or the terrible things he has put himself through have changed his behavior. He seems to have gotten a little better controlling his temper but in some ways I wonder if he has just become a better manipulator. I too have felt the guilt for a long time but I am getting over it. Since he has been out of the house things have been a bit better. Even now when I go on vacation it helps relive some of the worry as , I still dread the phone calls asking for money. I guess I feel I have an excuse not to answer my phone not that I should need one. I always hope for the best but am trying to be realistic that he may never change much . I am 64 and I don't want my last years full of constant worry,fear and concern that over takes me and makes me unable to find joy in my life. [/QUOTE]
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