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<blockquote data-quote="tishthedish" data-source="post: 677250" data-attributes="member: 17103"><p>Thanks so much you two. Reading the interchange and back and forth was like having 3 brains working for me...mine, Copa's and SWOT''s. </p><p></p><p>I don't fear CPS. It's a non-issue. It was something my son pulled out of the air. My GS is 5 years old, 60 lbs. and aggressive. My husband has scratches that bled all over his arms from just trying to help me get GS dressed for school. I have bruises from the bite marks but my reflexes are quicker after 7 months of this. We cannot take GS out for fear of a meltdown. We have essentially been prisoners in our own home. Don't get me wrong. We love him. He is affectionate and delightful, but cross him or anger him and he rages. And so many things can set him off. If someone inadvertently leaves the pantry open, he wants to pop every pop top on every can on the shelves. We gently say no and try to redirect him and he flips. He doesn't want to put his footie pajamas on backward to get on the school bus and he lays down as stiff as a board and if you try to put them on he goes feral. It is written into his bus plan/iep that he cannot board the bus unless he is dressed this way because he strips and urinates and defecates on the seat. And then he gets to school and has a perfect day. </p><p></p><p>This is my feeling too SWOT. I don't get it. I never will.</p><p></p><p>I have but don't know what it is. I'll be looking it up. My D H and I do go to Al-Anon. I've gone for 18 months. He's gone twice. (I go during the day. We need all hands on deck for when G S is home.)</p><p></p><p>He has threatened before. Telling something, throwing a vulnerability shared back in our faces, suicide. It's a ploy and it no longer phases me. It disgusts and shocks me. AND he wasn't saying he wasn't responsible for the feces. He was saying that it happened last week on his watch and he left some there from last week and then added to it this week. My husband and I don't use that bathroom. But we have ABA therapists working down there and they might use the bathroom. How embarrassing. I reminded him that they are mandated reporters and they could easily report us and our home for unsanitary conditions that we didn't even know existed. </p><p></p><p>Please know that I do not run around with a camera in my hand ready to take evidence photos. But this is a child that has lied to us, stolen from us, might lie about us and is a gaslighter extraordinaire. This has gone on for 5 years and we have lived in fear of something happening to our GS. 2 things have. He was found in 5 feet of water in a lake clinging to a pole and found nude on a 4 lane highway at night and turned into police by a stranger. </p><p></p><p>Copa, everything you said is true and valid. There are 3 generations of my family at stake. They ask me every week on a conference call how things are going. I am not going to participate on the call this week. But, as a foster parent, I too am a mandated reporter. But as a parent I know this will devastate my son. As a grandparent I know that caring for this child is beyond, way beyond what my husband and I can do. We will be lucky to make the 5 months. It's that hard and it's that exhausting, but we know that every minute we invest now could make a difference in our GS's life in the near term and long after we are no longer here.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="tishthedish, post: 677250, member: 17103"] Thanks so much you two. Reading the interchange and back and forth was like having 3 brains working for me...mine, Copa's and SWOT''s. I don't fear CPS. It's a non-issue. It was something my son pulled out of the air. My GS is 5 years old, 60 lbs. and aggressive. My husband has scratches that bled all over his arms from just trying to help me get GS dressed for school. I have bruises from the bite marks but my reflexes are quicker after 7 months of this. We cannot take GS out for fear of a meltdown. We have essentially been prisoners in our own home. Don't get me wrong. We love him. He is affectionate and delightful, but cross him or anger him and he rages. And so many things can set him off. If someone inadvertently leaves the pantry open, he wants to pop every pop top on every can on the shelves. We gently say no and try to redirect him and he flips. He doesn't want to put his footie pajamas on backward to get on the school bus and he lays down as stiff as a board and if you try to put them on he goes feral. It is written into his bus plan/iep that he cannot board the bus unless he is dressed this way because he strips and urinates and defecates on the seat. And then he gets to school and has a perfect day. This is my feeling too SWOT. I don't get it. I never will. I have but don't know what it is. I'll be looking it up. My D H and I do go to Al-Anon. I've gone for 18 months. He's gone twice. (I go during the day. We need all hands on deck for when G S is home.) He has threatened before. Telling something, throwing a vulnerability shared back in our faces, suicide. It's a ploy and it no longer phases me. It disgusts and shocks me. AND he wasn't saying he wasn't responsible for the feces. He was saying that it happened last week on his watch and he left some there from last week and then added to it this week. My husband and I don't use that bathroom. But we have ABA therapists working down there and they might use the bathroom. How embarrassing. I reminded him that they are mandated reporters and they could easily report us and our home for unsanitary conditions that we didn't even know existed. Please know that I do not run around with a camera in my hand ready to take evidence photos. But this is a child that has lied to us, stolen from us, might lie about us and is a gaslighter extraordinaire. This has gone on for 5 years and we have lived in fear of something happening to our GS. 2 things have. He was found in 5 feet of water in a lake clinging to a pole and found nude on a 4 lane highway at night and turned into police by a stranger. Copa, everything you said is true and valid. There are 3 generations of my family at stake. They ask me every week on a conference call how things are going. I am not going to participate on the call this week. But, as a foster parent, I too am a mandated reporter. But as a parent I know this will devastate my son. As a grandparent I know that caring for this child is beyond, way beyond what my husband and I can do. We will be lucky to make the 5 months. It's that hard and it's that exhausting, but we know that every minute we invest now could make a difference in our GS's life in the near term and long after we are no longer here. [/QUOTE]
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