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Found a file of picoisms
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<blockquote data-quote="DammitJanet" data-source="post: 122747" data-attributes="member: 1514"><p>Another from HopefulDucky (another MIA):</p><p></p><p>Dear Pico,</p><p>I want to thank you for the love and wisdom you have shared with us. You have truly touched my life for the good, and helped me to be a better mom. Thank you.</p><p>I have a lot of postings that I have saved. Here is one, and I will look for more.</p><p>Author Topic: When you're at the end of your rope: Pico, Administrator</p><p></p><p>Dear ones.</p><p></p><p>I have noticed that a lot of you are at the end of your rope, particularly some of our newer members, who are struggling just to understand what these diagnoses are.</p><p></p><p>Several folks are reading Douglas Riley's "The Defiant Child" at the moment; some are reading Ross Greene's "The Explosive Child"; and others are cowering in front of their computers hoping that Jesus will save them quick, before the kid comes home!</p><p></p><p>(Sorry for my sacrilidge, folks. Lighten up a bit, OK?)</p><p></p><p>Now, from the Been There Done That Hated the Shirt, Threw It Away, It Came Back, Shreded It and Burned the Pieces Department:</p><p></p><p>I have learned a thing or two in the last three or so odd years, while I've been a Twisted Mother with an ODD kid.</p><p></p><p>One. You have to be willing to prove to your kid that you gave him his stubborn gene, and the proof is that you are going to out stubborn him. Now that does not mean you are going to resort to physical confrontation over dirty socks or bad breath, but it does mean that you are going to make a short list of what you ARE willing to go to the mat on, and suffer a meltdown over (for me it was bleeding, fire, and willful injury) and then you tell little Mr. Short Britches just that. You will not worry about dirty socks on his bedroom floor. It's his floor. It's his socks. It's his problem. Not yours. Don't look at it. BUT, you will not have anyone in your house abusing people, hurting animals, playing with fire, using drugs, or endangering anyone, including themselves. Period. And ANYBODY who violates that is going to be very very miserable. No good stuff will happen to them. None.</p><p></p><p>As for the teens who think the home front is a place to stop and take a pee break, and restock from the fridge: Put a sign on the fridge and the bathroom door.</p><p></p><p>For Use By Residents Only. Not A Public Facility.</p><p></p><p>Then tell the kid, either you live here, or you don't. Let me know before supper. If you live here, you will be home by (xx:00 pm.) or I will know where you are and that you are there for the night, and I can verify it if I choose.</p><p></p><p>Don't lie to me. I hate a lie worse than the ugliest possible truth.</p><p></p><p>Dear ones. You can do it. You will not necessarily all win the battle. Some kids just don't get it. Some kids will resist your parenting to the bitter end. It doesn't mean you failed. It just is a tragedy that we all are risking every day. Bring your grief here, and we will try to help you carry that load.</p><p></p><p>Some of you will make it, and your kids will turn out OK. Not necessarily what you had planned umpteen years ago, but not likely to end up in prison for life or even extended periods of time.</p><p></p><p>Some of you will have kids that finally get it, and grow up into respectable if not scary conservative human beings. You will be the lucky few, I fear.</p><p></p><p>But you will also be the proof that for all of us there is something to keep trying for, that there are some kids who will win this **** shoot; that there are some parents who will be able to look back at these years and say, It Was Worth It, but I never want to do it again!</p><p></p><p>Welcome to our world. We're an amazing bunch of folk. And you are too, 'cause you cared enough to look for answers for your kid.</p><p></p><p>_______________________________</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DammitJanet, post: 122747, member: 1514"] Another from HopefulDucky (another MIA): Dear Pico, I want to thank you for the love and wisdom you have shared with us. You have truly touched my life for the good, and helped me to be a better mom. Thank you. I have a lot of postings that I have saved. Here is one, and I will look for more. Author Topic: When you're at the end of your rope: Pico, Administrator Dear ones. I have noticed that a lot of you are at the end of your rope, particularly some of our newer members, who are struggling just to understand what these diagnoses are. Several folks are reading Douglas Riley's "The Defiant Child" at the moment; some are reading Ross Greene's "The Explosive Child"; and others are cowering in front of their computers hoping that Jesus will save them quick, before the kid comes home! (Sorry for my sacrilidge, folks. Lighten up a bit, OK?) Now, from the Been There Done That Hated the Shirt, Threw It Away, It Came Back, Shreded It and Burned the Pieces Department: I have learned a thing or two in the last three or so odd years, while I've been a Twisted Mother with an ODD kid. One. You have to be willing to prove to your kid that you gave him his stubborn gene, and the proof is that you are going to out stubborn him. Now that does not mean you are going to resort to physical confrontation over dirty socks or bad breath, but it does mean that you are going to make a short list of what you ARE willing to go to the mat on, and suffer a meltdown over (for me it was bleeding, fire, and willful injury) and then you tell little Mr. Short Britches just that. You will not worry about dirty socks on his bedroom floor. It's his floor. It's his socks. It's his problem. Not yours. Don't look at it. BUT, you will not have anyone in your house abusing people, hurting animals, playing with fire, using drugs, or endangering anyone, including themselves. Period. And ANYBODY who violates that is going to be very very miserable. No good stuff will happen to them. None. As for the teens who think the home front is a place to stop and take a pee break, and restock from the fridge: Put a sign on the fridge and the bathroom door. For Use By Residents Only. Not A Public Facility. Then tell the kid, either you live here, or you don't. Let me know before supper. If you live here, you will be home by (xx:00 pm.) or I will know where you are and that you are there for the night, and I can verify it if I choose. Don't lie to me. I hate a lie worse than the ugliest possible truth. Dear ones. You can do it. You will not necessarily all win the battle. Some kids just don't get it. Some kids will resist your parenting to the bitter end. It doesn't mean you failed. It just is a tragedy that we all are risking every day. Bring your grief here, and we will try to help you carry that load. Some of you will make it, and your kids will turn out OK. Not necessarily what you had planned umpteen years ago, but not likely to end up in prison for life or even extended periods of time. Some of you will have kids that finally get it, and grow up into respectable if not scary conservative human beings. You will be the lucky few, I fear. But you will also be the proof that for all of us there is something to keep trying for, that there are some kids who will win this **** shoot; that there are some parents who will be able to look back at these years and say, It Was Worth It, but I never want to do it again! Welcome to our world. We're an amazing bunch of folk. And you are too, 'cause you cared enough to look for answers for your kid. _______________________________ [/QUOTE]
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