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<blockquote data-quote="LittleDudesMom" data-source="post: 431566" data-attributes="member: 805"><p>HaoZi,</p><p></p><p>there's a pretty good chance you've hit the nail on the head. I know, at least for my difficult child, experiences at school in general were triggers. I can't list all the situations that triggered his anxiety or frustration or raging - never knew which of three were going to be a reaction.</p><p></p><p>The combo of the difficult child spring/end of the year thing and issues at school could very well be the cocktail that is setting her off.</p><p></p><p>Have you sat down and talked with her about what is going on? Does she have any input into why she's not handling things? You know, when my difficult child was pretty young, 2nd grade, we started this nightly ritual of "how was your day?" It was a quiet time where I would either sit or lay on his bed after "lights out" and we would share the events of our day. He was relaxed. Talking about school experiences didn't make him upset at that point because it was far removed in his mind. </p><p></p><p>I learned so much during those "no judgement", relaxed conversations. I learned that he understood, so much more than I ever imagined, what obstacles he was dealing with and how hard he wanted to be the same as everyone else. He and I did this from second half of 2nd grade through 7th grade! Sometimes I even wish for those quiet, close times! But at 15.5, it's not happening with a boy!</p><p></p><p>It was easy to gently encourage or give a lesson in that very relaxed situation.</p><p></p><p>I tell you this for two reasons. First, it's a suggestion about a good time to bond with your kids and second, to illustrate that our kids know a whole lot more about what is going on than I think we give them credit for. We just have to provide an environment where they feel comfortable sharing.</p><p></p><p>Sorry that things are so difficult trying to juggle the job and difficult child's needs. I hope you are able to work things out with school and change that conference.</p><p></p><p>Hugs,</p><p>Sharon</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="LittleDudesMom, post: 431566, member: 805"] HaoZi, there's a pretty good chance you've hit the nail on the head. I know, at least for my difficult child, experiences at school in general were triggers. I can't list all the situations that triggered his anxiety or frustration or raging - never knew which of three were going to be a reaction. The combo of the difficult child spring/end of the year thing and issues at school could very well be the cocktail that is setting her off. Have you sat down and talked with her about what is going on? Does she have any input into why she's not handling things? You know, when my difficult child was pretty young, 2nd grade, we started this nightly ritual of "how was your day?" It was a quiet time where I would either sit or lay on his bed after "lights out" and we would share the events of our day. He was relaxed. Talking about school experiences didn't make him upset at that point because it was far removed in his mind. I learned so much during those "no judgement", relaxed conversations. I learned that he understood, so much more than I ever imagined, what obstacles he was dealing with and how hard he wanted to be the same as everyone else. He and I did this from second half of 2nd grade through 7th grade! Sometimes I even wish for those quiet, close times! But at 15.5, it's not happening with a boy! It was easy to gently encourage or give a lesson in that very relaxed situation. I tell you this for two reasons. First, it's a suggestion about a good time to bond with your kids and second, to illustrate that our kids know a whole lot more about what is going on than I think we give them credit for. We just have to provide an environment where they feel comfortable sharing. Sorry that things are so difficult trying to juggle the job and difficult child's needs. I hope you are able to work things out with school and change that conference. Hugs, Sharon [/QUOTE]
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