Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
"Gaslighting": my new favorite word!
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Echolette" data-source="post: 653541" data-attributes="member: 17269"><p>One of the things I learned from the book is that gaslighters are not always doing it on purpose...it is their own personal pathology at play. An example would be along the lines of </p><p>husband: I saw you flirting with your co worker at the office party last night!</p><p>wife: I wasn't flirting! I was just talking to him!</p><p>husband: you know it bothers me when you shower attention on other men.</p><p>wife: but I wasn't ! I am not even attracted to him that way! I was just talking to a colleague!</p><p>husband: you can't see yourself. your approach was very flirtatious. It makes me feel jealous and insecure. I wish you would stop it.</p><p>wife: (now feeling sort of guilty even though she genuinely was having a professional conversation with no sexual or flirtatious overtones)..Well OK, honey, I will try not to do that (WHAT????) again.</p><p></p><p>She is now confused about what she has done wrong She is even wondering if she was flirting, which she wasn't. She also promised to stop behaving in a way that she can't even define and therefore can't know when she is doing it or how to stop. This is clearly a totally losing proposition for her. </p><p></p><p>She's been gaslighted.</p><p></p><p>He is controlling and jealous, but he wasn't deliberatley trying to confuse her.</p><p></p><p>Happens to me all the time!</p><p></p><p>Echo</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Echolette, post: 653541, member: 17269"] One of the things I learned from the book is that gaslighters are not always doing it on purpose...it is their own personal pathology at play. An example would be along the lines of husband: I saw you flirting with your co worker at the office party last night! wife: I wasn't flirting! I was just talking to him! husband: you know it bothers me when you shower attention on other men. wife: but I wasn't ! I am not even attracted to him that way! I was just talking to a colleague! husband: you can't see yourself. your approach was very flirtatious. It makes me feel jealous and insecure. I wish you would stop it. wife: (now feeling sort of guilty even though she genuinely was having a professional conversation with no sexual or flirtatious overtones)..Well OK, honey, I will try not to do that (WHAT????) again. She is now confused about what she has done wrong She is even wondering if she was flirting, which she wasn't. She also promised to stop behaving in a way that she can't even define and therefore can't know when she is doing it or how to stop. This is clearly a totally losing proposition for her. She's been gaslighted. He is controlling and jealous, but he wasn't deliberatley trying to confuse her. Happens to me all the time! Echo [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
"Gaslighting": my new favorite word!
Top