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Genie's out of the bottle!
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<blockquote data-quote="Malika" data-source="post: 580184" data-attributes="member: 11227"><p>Thank you for your comments. It is good to have a wider perspective and feel a little less persecuted <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite3" alt=":(" title="Frown :(" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":(" /> ! </p><p>We all act with the information we have to hand and make a judgement in the light of that. When I came to the village I was of course thinking that the small, family atmosphere would be good for him and help him learn. There is truth in that but now I feel guilty about having left him in the hands of people who have no understanding - though I battled to get it for him with his previous teacher - and who have probably damaged him. But it's no good going down that road!!! I myself did not know whether J was really ADHD or not, or what he was, the signs was so confusing. I acted with good intentions and now it is clear that, as you all say, there is a signpost in front of me with a big finger clearly pointing out of the village... and its ignorance and gossip. Not that it will be paradise somewhere else, of course!</p><p>I think whatamess is right. I think at this stage there is no conspiracy to "evict" us but it is clear that they are very, very alarmed by J's raging. Yet why has he suddenly started doing this?? Some connection, presumably, to the constant punishing. Of course kids like J are so difficult to understand and manage, and on top of that we HAVE had our attachment difficulties. For sure and certain, the village is not going to change any century soon! I suppose it is part of their charm. Love it or leave it. I do have understanding for their ignorance, Ktllc, in a sense I don't take it personally. If we do have the meeting with the doctor, perhaps it will be a useful thing for them. Anyway, obviously my point of focus has to be J and not educating them! </p><p>Just spoke to the psychiatrist's office and the secretary said she will ring me today. So hopefully we will be able to set up some meeting.</p><p>I think compassion is always a rare and precious commodity in our world. It seems to be in short supply for this situation right here and now. We do need more compassion and understanding, as all of our difficult children do... At least there are some people who DO understand, who do not judge but want to help. Just have to find more of them <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Malika, post: 580184, member: 11227"] Thank you for your comments. It is good to have a wider perspective and feel a little less persecuted :frowny: ! We all act with the information we have to hand and make a judgement in the light of that. When I came to the village I was of course thinking that the small, family atmosphere would be good for him and help him learn. There is truth in that but now I feel guilty about having left him in the hands of people who have no understanding - though I battled to get it for him with his previous teacher - and who have probably damaged him. But it's no good going down that road!!! I myself did not know whether J was really ADHD or not, or what he was, the signs was so confusing. I acted with good intentions and now it is clear that, as you all say, there is a signpost in front of me with a big finger clearly pointing out of the village... and its ignorance and gossip. Not that it will be paradise somewhere else, of course! I think whatamess is right. I think at this stage there is no conspiracy to "evict" us but it is clear that they are very, very alarmed by J's raging. Yet why has he suddenly started doing this?? Some connection, presumably, to the constant punishing. Of course kids like J are so difficult to understand and manage, and on top of that we HAVE had our attachment difficulties. For sure and certain, the village is not going to change any century soon! I suppose it is part of their charm. Love it or leave it. I do have understanding for their ignorance, Ktllc, in a sense I don't take it personally. If we do have the meeting with the doctor, perhaps it will be a useful thing for them. Anyway, obviously my point of focus has to be J and not educating them! Just spoke to the psychiatrist's office and the secretary said she will ring me today. So hopefully we will be able to set up some meeting. I think compassion is always a rare and precious commodity in our world. It seems to be in short supply for this situation right here and now. We do need more compassion and understanding, as all of our difficult children do... At least there are some people who DO understand, who do not judge but want to help. Just have to find more of them :) [/QUOTE]
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