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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 610203" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>I'm really sorry you had to join us and are having such a hard time. Did your son, by any chance, have a very chaotic life during his infancy and toddlerhood? Sounds like he could have a form of attachment disorder, which often happens when the first three years (and sometimes beyond) are full of many caregivers, chaos, lack of one solid caregiver and stability, and even abuse. Was he adopted? Did you divorce very early on and then remarry or have a boyfriend? Anything at all?</p><p></p><p>Right off the bat to me, as a layman and not a neuropsychologist, it sounds like some sort of attachment disorder because of the meanness involved. Does he pee and poop inappropriately too or love fire? Anything else of significance? Can you give us a background on your son, including information on his biological gene pool on both sides? </p><p></p><p>My first recommendation is to take him to a neuropsychologist and the sooner the better, but a neuropsychologist would likely miss anything related to attachment problems, if indeed that is his problem. Hurting animals is serious. I hope you no longer have any. We lived with a, what I call, dangerous child and he killed two dogs.</p><p></p><p>Throughout all of this, understand that this is not your fault and try to take care of yourself as often as you can by doing nice things for yourself and leaving your son to other relatives so you can get respite. Is there a father around? An understanding relative (usually others don't understand though). </p><p></p><p>I did raise a child who hurt others and was mean to animals. Not quite to your son's extent. We got him help, but he is an adult now and still pretty much the same. I just came to realize that I am entitled to detach from him. Your little boy is too young not to take care of, but you can mentally detach from some of his stuff as long as you are careful to make sure that other siblings and animals are safe from him. One thing we parents do is put alarms on the doors at night so they can't "night-wander" and maybe do damage at night. My son was a much loved baby and child, but I had serious depression after his birth and maybe that caused his issues. And then maybe he inherited it. There are other people in my family who seem to lack empathy, although not to his extent. The genetics part was really out of my control.</p><p></p><p>Again, DO NOT waste time blaming yourself. DO take precautions if you still have animals or if you have young children. I am thinking normal parenting won't work for this child. You are not the only one here with a child who is violent.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 610203, member: 1550"] I'm really sorry you had to join us and are having such a hard time. Did your son, by any chance, have a very chaotic life during his infancy and toddlerhood? Sounds like he could have a form of attachment disorder, which often happens when the first three years (and sometimes beyond) are full of many caregivers, chaos, lack of one solid caregiver and stability, and even abuse. Was he adopted? Did you divorce very early on and then remarry or have a boyfriend? Anything at all? Right off the bat to me, as a layman and not a neuropsychologist, it sounds like some sort of attachment disorder because of the meanness involved. Does he pee and poop inappropriately too or love fire? Anything else of significance? Can you give us a background on your son, including information on his biological gene pool on both sides? My first recommendation is to take him to a neuropsychologist and the sooner the better, but a neuropsychologist would likely miss anything related to attachment problems, if indeed that is his problem. Hurting animals is serious. I hope you no longer have any. We lived with a, what I call, dangerous child and he killed two dogs. Throughout all of this, understand that this is not your fault and try to take care of yourself as often as you can by doing nice things for yourself and leaving your son to other relatives so you can get respite. Is there a father around? An understanding relative (usually others don't understand though). I did raise a child who hurt others and was mean to animals. Not quite to your son's extent. We got him help, but he is an adult now and still pretty much the same. I just came to realize that I am entitled to detach from him. Your little boy is too young not to take care of, but you can mentally detach from some of his stuff as long as you are careful to make sure that other siblings and animals are safe from him. One thing we parents do is put alarms on the doors at night so they can't "night-wander" and maybe do damage at night. My son was a much loved baby and child, but I had serious depression after his birth and maybe that caused his issues. And then maybe he inherited it. There are other people in my family who seem to lack empathy, although not to his extent. The genetics part was really out of my control. Again, DO NOT waste time blaming yourself. DO take precautions if you still have animals or if you have young children. I am thinking normal parenting won't work for this child. You are not the only one here with a child who is violent. [/QUOTE]
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