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Parent Support Forums
Substance Abuse
Glad I found this site...many of you have been there, or are there..whats next?
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<blockquote data-quote="Zardo" data-source="post: 585501" data-attributes="member: 12490"><p>Hi Rose- I so know what you're feeling right now. The search for answers in the times of crisis is all consuming. I am feeling it myself these days. The hard truth of the situation is that no one can tell you or me what is to come next. It differs for different people. With all that my difficult child has been through, you would think that he would be working hard at developing a new life and feeling true remorse for where he went wrong, but I don't think that will happen right now. On this board and in my parent support group, there are as many different versions of denial and recovery as there are people. "Rock bottom" is different for everyone. Some of the stories in my support group include multiple arrests, jail time and yet still no recovery. For others, it's one brush with the law and they right their ways. There is no way to foresee what your difficult children journey will be. So - what do we do to find peace? That is the answer you and I should be trying to focus our efforts on. We need to let their journey be theirs, not personalize their drama and failures and harbor anger toward them. Assure them of our love, but also our boundaries and let them know that we are here to support their recovery when they are ready. When they are in times of denial, we must bolster our ability to detach and not let their illness define our days. I say all of this knowing that I am struggling to find this place myself, but I know it is where I too need to be. I wish you peace.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Zardo, post: 585501, member: 12490"] Hi Rose- I so know what you're feeling right now. The search for answers in the times of crisis is all consuming. I am feeling it myself these days. The hard truth of the situation is that no one can tell you or me what is to come next. It differs for different people. With all that my difficult child has been through, you would think that he would be working hard at developing a new life and feeling true remorse for where he went wrong, but I don't think that will happen right now. On this board and in my parent support group, there are as many different versions of denial and recovery as there are people. "Rock bottom" is different for everyone. Some of the stories in my support group include multiple arrests, jail time and yet still no recovery. For others, it's one brush with the law and they right their ways. There is no way to foresee what your difficult children journey will be. So - what do we do to find peace? That is the answer you and I should be trying to focus our efforts on. We need to let their journey be theirs, not personalize their drama and failures and harbor anger toward them. Assure them of our love, but also our boundaries and let them know that we are here to support their recovery when they are ready. When they are in times of denial, we must bolster our ability to detach and not let their illness define our days. I say all of this knowing that I am struggling to find this place myself, but I know it is where I too need to be. I wish you peace. [/QUOTE]
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Glad I found this site...many of you have been there, or are there..whats next?
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