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Substance Abuse
Going to file charges on 16 year old son
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<blockquote data-quote="Nancy" data-source="post: 661658" data-attributes="member: 59"><p>UpandDown, welcome to our board. We filed charges on our daughter several times. The first couple times we called the police they talked to her at home, then they had her come into the station and the juvenile officer talked to her at length. He was so good with her but made it clear that at some point he would send the charges downtown if she didn't straighten out.</p><p></p><p>Every time we tried to impose rules she threw a fit. She threw several phones and broke them, she threw picture frames shattering them. One day she opened the kitchen cupboard and took glasses out and smashed them on the floor. The police came and they finally did send her downtown.</p><p></p><p>The first couple times downtown they put her on probation and told her she had to follow our rules. Then they sent her to detention for the weekend to teach her something. It did work for about a year. We prayed we could keep her safe and out of trouble until she was 18. Shortly after turning 18 she went to college and was arrested 6 weeks later for smoking pot and drinking in the dorm and was suspended.</p><p></p><p>Our community police were very helpful. They did help keep her out of more serious trouble. We prayed that she would mature and start making better decisions. She had to learn the hard way, living with druggie friends, going to rehab, sober houses, losing jobs, shoplifting, court again, probation, drug testing and now finally at the age of 24 she is holding a job and not breaking the law. She drinks too much and I fear someday it will catch up with her but for now she is responsible and living on her own.</p><p></p><p>I would do it all over again if I had to. Don't let him threaten you with hating you, he will anyway because he just wants to do what he wants to do. You are not his friend, you are his parent. It's your job to keep him safe until he can do that himself.</p><p></p><p>I had great neighbors too. I did go to both of them and explain that we were having problems with her and that I wanted them to know we were not abusing her or doing anything illegal and that they were there to help us. The neighbors were so supportive over the years. Don't be ashamed, I found the more I talked about it the more I found parents going through the same thing.</p><p></p><p>I hope the experience of the intake officer helps and does open up some services.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Nancy, post: 661658, member: 59"] UpandDown, welcome to our board. We filed charges on our daughter several times. The first couple times we called the police they talked to her at home, then they had her come into the station and the juvenile officer talked to her at length. He was so good with her but made it clear that at some point he would send the charges downtown if she didn't straighten out. Every time we tried to impose rules she threw a fit. She threw several phones and broke them, she threw picture frames shattering them. One day she opened the kitchen cupboard and took glasses out and smashed them on the floor. The police came and they finally did send her downtown. The first couple times downtown they put her on probation and told her she had to follow our rules. Then they sent her to detention for the weekend to teach her something. It did work for about a year. We prayed we could keep her safe and out of trouble until she was 18. Shortly after turning 18 she went to college and was arrested 6 weeks later for smoking pot and drinking in the dorm and was suspended. Our community police were very helpful. They did help keep her out of more serious trouble. We prayed that she would mature and start making better decisions. She had to learn the hard way, living with druggie friends, going to rehab, sober houses, losing jobs, shoplifting, court again, probation, drug testing and now finally at the age of 24 she is holding a job and not breaking the law. She drinks too much and I fear someday it will catch up with her but for now she is responsible and living on her own. I would do it all over again if I had to. Don't let him threaten you with hating you, he will anyway because he just wants to do what he wants to do. You are not his friend, you are his parent. It's your job to keep him safe until he can do that himself. I had great neighbors too. I did go to both of them and explain that we were having problems with her and that I wanted them to know we were not abusing her or doing anything illegal and that they were there to help us. The neighbors were so supportive over the years. Don't be ashamed, I found the more I talked about it the more I found parents going through the same thing. I hope the experience of the intake officer helps and does open up some services. [/QUOTE]
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Going to file charges on 16 year old son
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