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Parent Support Forums
Substance Abuse
good morning need some advice
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 111866" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Hon, big hugs. Listen, dont blame yourself or anything you did. If he's doing good at dad's, doesn't do drugs, etc. LET HIM STAY THERE and enjoy your other two kids. Your son may have had some bad breaks. Most of us have. That doesn't justify a pity party and taking drugs (not all drugs show up on drug screens--my daughter passed a drug test too). If the child knows he's going to be tested, they usually abstain for the test. Regardless, MY story is that I went through a divorce and remarried. I had three kids. Only my daughter chose the drug route for many reasons that she has now told me. At this point in time, in my opinion you are over-analyzing the why. The "why" doesn't matter. It's the "that." THAT he is doing it. He needs to stop and must choose to do so on his own, regardless of what he perceives as his crappy life. If you feel sorry for him, you can't help him with his bigger issues--the drug use and lack of ambition. I wouldn't help him unless he cuts the pot or anything else he may be huffing or ingesting, goes back to school, and shows he's trying to be responsible. in my opinion that will only make him see that you're guilty and he'll exploit that. difficult child's take a mile when you give an inch. I hope your son gets his act together. (((Hugs)))</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 111866, member: 1550"] Hon, big hugs. Listen, dont blame yourself or anything you did. If he's doing good at dad's, doesn't do drugs, etc. LET HIM STAY THERE and enjoy your other two kids. Your son may have had some bad breaks. Most of us have. That doesn't justify a pity party and taking drugs (not all drugs show up on drug screens--my daughter passed a drug test too). If the child knows he's going to be tested, they usually abstain for the test. Regardless, MY story is that I went through a divorce and remarried. I had three kids. Only my daughter chose the drug route for many reasons that she has now told me. At this point in time, in my opinion you are over-analyzing the why. The "why" doesn't matter. It's the "that." THAT he is doing it. He needs to stop and must choose to do so on his own, regardless of what he perceives as his crappy life. If you feel sorry for him, you can't help him with his bigger issues--the drug use and lack of ambition. I wouldn't help him unless he cuts the pot or anything else he may be huffing or ingesting, goes back to school, and shows he's trying to be responsible. in my opinion that will only make him see that you're guilty and he'll exploit that. difficult child's take a mile when you give an inch. I hope your son gets his act together. (((Hugs))) [/QUOTE]
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Substance Abuse
good morning need some advice
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