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<blockquote data-quote="Fran" data-source="post: 297916" data-attributes="member: 3"><p>Sure seems like a lot of outside people in your family. Way too much "he said, she said".</p><p>I would probably cut out sharing anything important about difficult child with sis. Make your focus about your household. </p><p>Understanding expectations of each family membe isn't having him audition but more of a job description. </p><p>Don't we all have job descriptions as a member of the family? What does he think his role should be?</p><p></p><p>Also, he doesn't have to like your husband but he should treat him with respect. After all you and husband have provided him with a home if he wants it. Biting the hand that feeds you shows fear and lack of appreciation.</p><p></p><p>I'm not sure why he feels he should believe everyone else. </p><p></p><p>Your sister had her turn to raise kids. She shouldn't be mom to difficult child but an aunt. She should be encouraging difficult child to problem solve and accept at least half of the responsibility for the situation that he is in. </p><p></p><p>Hopefully, you, husband, easy child and difficult child will find some common ground to rebuild a foundation but I don't see it happening until difficult child stops believing all the negative info that he seems to be fed.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Fran, post: 297916, member: 3"] Sure seems like a lot of outside people in your family. Way too much "he said, she said". I would probably cut out sharing anything important about difficult child with sis. Make your focus about your household. Understanding expectations of each family membe isn't having him audition but more of a job description. Don't we all have job descriptions as a member of the family? What does he think his role should be? Also, he doesn't have to like your husband but he should treat him with respect. After all you and husband have provided him with a home if he wants it. Biting the hand that feeds you shows fear and lack of appreciation. I'm not sure why he feels he should believe everyone else. Your sister had her turn to raise kids. She shouldn't be mom to difficult child but an aunt. She should be encouraging difficult child to problem solve and accept at least half of the responsibility for the situation that he is in. Hopefully, you, husband, easy child and difficult child will find some common ground to rebuild a foundation but I don't see it happening until difficult child stops believing all the negative info that he seems to be fed. [/QUOTE]
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