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<blockquote data-quote="pepperidge" data-source="post: 411628" data-attributes="member: 2322"><p>Linda,</p><p></p><p>My son's therapists have both used the expression with us that we are working harder on his problems than he is himself. It's a sign that something is out of whack somewhere. I think that is what you are getting at in part--that it is time for parents to back off. She has told us to start asking more questions about what he wants to do etc rather than planning for him. I think this general approach can work where there is some level of realism and responsibility. When they are approaching 18 soon enough we have to start turning over the reins to them unless they are totally irresponsible--in which case it is a whole different ballgame and there is probably little realistically we can do anyway.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="pepperidge, post: 411628, member: 2322"] Linda, My son's therapists have both used the expression with us that we are working harder on his problems than he is himself. It's a sign that something is out of whack somewhere. I think that is what you are getting at in part--that it is time for parents to back off. She has told us to start asking more questions about what he wants to do etc rather than planning for him. I think this general approach can work where there is some level of realism and responsibility. When they are approaching 18 soon enough we have to start turning over the reins to them unless they are totally irresponsible--in which case it is a whole different ballgame and there is probably little realistically we can do anyway. [/QUOTE]
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