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Haven't been on in a while, but need to know if I'm over reacting or not..
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 543463" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Hi, hon. Is this an adopted child? Sounds like she is doing some serious attachment disorder things such as killing animals and starting fires. If she also pees and poops inappropriately, she is a perfect McDonald Triad:</p><p></p><p><a href="http://classictriads.com/macdonald-triad" target="_blank">http://classictriads.com/macdonald-triad</a></p><p></p><p>Don't feel guilty. This happened to your child before she was in your care. And it doesn't help that she is bounced around a lot, including to BM who was likely not a very good parent. None of it is your fault, but you are not overreacting and if you have pets, you are going to have to watch her with them ALL THE TIME. Ditto your easy child. I agree that easy child shouldn't be with BM when difficult child is there. </p><p></p><p>We adopted a boy who killed two of our dogs and our other kids were too afraid of him to tell us he'd done it. He also abused the younger two. </p><p></p><p>Can you find a therapist, who is familiar with adoption and attachment, to take her to? We had a horrendous experience when we adopted the 11 year old boy. I also know a woman who had an eight year old foster child who also liked fire. He burned her house down (this is a true story). While the firemen were putting out the fire, he smiled and asked if they could go to McDonalds!!!</p><p></p><p> There are, sadly, many stories about older adopted children who were so badly abused early in life (or neglected or tossed around) that they are furious little people and don't care about anyone because they have been so badly hurt themselves. Some can't be saved, as much as we hate to admit it. Take her behavior very seriously and watch her, your pets, and your easy child. Don't ever leave her unattended with the cats or your younger daughter. Maybe put an alarm on her door at night so if she leaves the room, you know it and can supervise where she goes. Tell easy child to lock her door. Maybe she can keep the cats with her at night. Night is a common time for damaged children to abuse because nobody is awake.</p><p></p><p></p><p>Hugs!!!!! I'm so sorry. Been there/done that. (P.S.--This child was taken away by CPS after we found out about his sexual abuse of our younger child. Sadly, we don't miss him. He was with us for two years and did all he could to destroy our family).</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 543463, member: 1550"] Hi, hon. Is this an adopted child? Sounds like she is doing some serious attachment disorder things such as killing animals and starting fires. If she also pees and poops inappropriately, she is a perfect McDonald Triad: [URL]http://classictriads.com/macdonald-triad[/URL] Don't feel guilty. This happened to your child before she was in your care. And it doesn't help that she is bounced around a lot, including to BM who was likely not a very good parent. None of it is your fault, but you are not overreacting and if you have pets, you are going to have to watch her with them ALL THE TIME. Ditto your easy child. I agree that easy child shouldn't be with BM when difficult child is there. We adopted a boy who killed two of our dogs and our other kids were too afraid of him to tell us he'd done it. He also abused the younger two. Can you find a therapist, who is familiar with adoption and attachment, to take her to? We had a horrendous experience when we adopted the 11 year old boy. I also know a woman who had an eight year old foster child who also liked fire. He burned her house down (this is a true story). While the firemen were putting out the fire, he smiled and asked if they could go to McDonalds!!! There are, sadly, many stories about older adopted children who were so badly abused early in life (or neglected or tossed around) that they are furious little people and don't care about anyone because they have been so badly hurt themselves. Some can't be saved, as much as we hate to admit it. Take her behavior very seriously and watch her, your pets, and your easy child. Don't ever leave her unattended with the cats or your younger daughter. Maybe put an alarm on her door at night so if she leaves the room, you know it and can supervise where she goes. Tell easy child to lock her door. Maybe she can keep the cats with her at night. Night is a common time for damaged children to abuse because nobody is awake. Hugs!!!!! I'm so sorry. Been there/done that. (P.S.--This child was taken away by CPS after we found out about his sexual abuse of our younger child. Sadly, we don't miss him. He was with us for two years and did all he could to destroy our family). [/QUOTE]
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Haven't been on in a while, but need to know if I'm over reacting or not..
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