Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
Having a low day
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="MissLulu" data-source="post: 754994" data-attributes="member: 24721"><p>Thanks for the support JMom. I really appreciate it. He is doing well at the moment. 11 months of full time employment is nothing to be sneezed at, and he's managed to save money, pay for his own fuel and phone, insurance etc. So on that front he's doing okay. Addiction is not his primary issue (although he has had an issue with pot in the past and he drinks). His substance abuse seems to be under control. He doesn't not appear to be smoking pot at all, but is drinking on weekends at social events. Alcohol doesn't seem to be a problem on it's own for him - he's not a big drinker - but it's an issue when he is also smoking weed. Not a good combination. The other issue is that he is medicated for anxiety and depression and he shouldn't be drinking or smoking on those medications. Last I heard he's stopped taking the medications, though. (He's very reluctant to discuss his medication/treatment with me.)</p><p></p><p>His main issue is his mental health. I know about the depression and anxiety diagnosis, but I think he has something else going on as well - possibly Borderline (BPD) or bipolar. Obviously I'm not a medical professional so not equipped to diagnose, but he won't share medical information with me. He has meltdowns - where he gets very angry and very distressed (I'm often the target of this). He's not physically threatening but he's unreasonable and it's very difficult to cope with. He's always very sorry afterwards. It's been about three months since he's had one of these episodes, but we can't predict when the next one will happen. He does see a psychologist regularly.</p><p></p><p>I know there will probably be people reading this wondering why I am complaining - he's working, paying bills, saving, seeking medical attention and he seems to be off the pot - that must seem pretty good to many people here. And it is. I'm not denying the progress he's made. But it's the walking on eggshells I can't bear. I can't trust that this will last. I hope it does and want the best for him, but I don't trust him.</p><p></p><p>Anyway, sorry, this wasn't supposed to be such a longwinded reply! I really just wanted to say we have had very similar discussion with him to the one you had with your son, and he was fine about it and agreed. We gave him a deadline of the end of January (this was months ago) but January is half over and he hasn't been able to find anywhere. We know he is looking - we've been to a couple of open houses with him and we've helped him by printing out some of the paperwork for his applications - but so far he's had no success. </p><p></p><p>Hopefully a solution will present itself soon. I feel worn out!</p><p></p><p>RE further steps. I don't think he's ready to take on anything more than the entry level job he has right now (in a small agricultural/manufacturing business) and I'm okay with that. I don't mind if this is what he does with the rest of his life, if that's what makes him feel okay. He struggles with confidence and self-esteem and every time he is promoted at work it ends in disaster. Last year he quit this job for three weeks after they promoted him. Thankfully his boss is a lovely, understanding man, who took him back.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="MissLulu, post: 754994, member: 24721"] Thanks for the support JMom. I really appreciate it. He is doing well at the moment. 11 months of full time employment is nothing to be sneezed at, and he's managed to save money, pay for his own fuel and phone, insurance etc. So on that front he's doing okay. Addiction is not his primary issue (although he has had an issue with pot in the past and he drinks). His substance abuse seems to be under control. He doesn't not appear to be smoking pot at all, but is drinking on weekends at social events. Alcohol doesn't seem to be a problem on it's own for him - he's not a big drinker - but it's an issue when he is also smoking weed. Not a good combination. The other issue is that he is medicated for anxiety and depression and he shouldn't be drinking or smoking on those medications. Last I heard he's stopped taking the medications, though. (He's very reluctant to discuss his medication/treatment with me.) His main issue is his mental health. I know about the depression and anxiety diagnosis, but I think he has something else going on as well - possibly Borderline (BPD) or bipolar. Obviously I'm not a medical professional so not equipped to diagnose, but he won't share medical information with me. He has meltdowns - where he gets very angry and very distressed (I'm often the target of this). He's not physically threatening but he's unreasonable and it's very difficult to cope with. He's always very sorry afterwards. It's been about three months since he's had one of these episodes, but we can't predict when the next one will happen. He does see a psychologist regularly. I know there will probably be people reading this wondering why I am complaining - he's working, paying bills, saving, seeking medical attention and he seems to be off the pot - that must seem pretty good to many people here. And it is. I'm not denying the progress he's made. But it's the walking on eggshells I can't bear. I can't trust that this will last. I hope it does and want the best for him, but I don't trust him. Anyway, sorry, this wasn't supposed to be such a longwinded reply! I really just wanted to say we have had very similar discussion with him to the one you had with your son, and he was fine about it and agreed. We gave him a deadline of the end of January (this was months ago) but January is half over and he hasn't been able to find anywhere. We know he is looking - we've been to a couple of open houses with him and we've helped him by printing out some of the paperwork for his applications - but so far he's had no success. Hopefully a solution will present itself soon. I feel worn out! RE further steps. I don't think he's ready to take on anything more than the entry level job he has right now (in a small agricultural/manufacturing business) and I'm okay with that. I don't mind if this is what he does with the rest of his life, if that's what makes him feel okay. He struggles with confidence and self-esteem and every time he is promoted at work it ends in disaster. Last year he quit this job for three weeks after they promoted him. Thankfully his boss is a lovely, understanding man, who took him back. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
Having a low day
Top