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Healthy ways to deal with anger - could use some tips
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<blockquote data-quote="recoveringenabler" data-source="post: 586563" data-attributes="member: 13542"><p>Suzir, this may or may not pertain to what you are living through right now, but I have found that there are times when the degree in which I am angry is equal to the degree in which I am heartbroken in some manner. Anger is often the first emotion we feel, betrayed, wronged, violated, etc. and the more accepted emotion in many cultures since sadness is something folks aren't as good at feeling or being around. So, sorrow will be right underneath the rage, pushing it up and out, while really, the underlying feeling is one of severe sorrow. </p><p></p><p>I recall an incident last year with my difficult child where I was working overtime to protect and take care of, her and we had gone through 2 days of terrible experiences with authorities where we felt powerless, denied access to the truth, manipulated, ourselves violated and exceedingly frustrated.............I left an official site and got in the car and fell apart. All the months of pent up emotions, angers, frustrations, all of it, but I think most of all powerlessness, unable to help my daughter or keep her safe, it all came to a head and I couldn't stop crying, sobbing really, those kinds of moments that the sheer pain of it all overcomes you and the dam breaks and it all comes pouring out. As painful as those moments are, they are cathartic and release all the pent up feelings so that equilibrium can once again reign. That moment for me was hard to feel, but it freed me of those harbored emotions. </p><p></p><p>Perhaps, after all this time of you dealing with the incident your difficult child experienced at the hands of others has left you feeling powerless as well and if it fits for you, you might attempt to uncover those buried feelings and allow them to come up, maybe in the form of tears. Crying, although not any fun at all, has been proven to lower the stress levels and bring balance back into the body, mind and spirit. It sounds as if you may have many different feelings going on, all surfacing as rage. Just a thought for you to consider. I wish you peace and send you hugs...........</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="recoveringenabler, post: 586563, member: 13542"] Suzir, this may or may not pertain to what you are living through right now, but I have found that there are times when the degree in which I am angry is equal to the degree in which I am heartbroken in some manner. Anger is often the first emotion we feel, betrayed, wronged, violated, etc. and the more accepted emotion in many cultures since sadness is something folks aren't as good at feeling or being around. So, sorrow will be right underneath the rage, pushing it up and out, while really, the underlying feeling is one of severe sorrow. I recall an incident last year with my difficult child where I was working overtime to protect and take care of, her and we had gone through 2 days of terrible experiences with authorities where we felt powerless, denied access to the truth, manipulated, ourselves violated and exceedingly frustrated.............I left an official site and got in the car and fell apart. All the months of pent up emotions, angers, frustrations, all of it, but I think most of all powerlessness, unable to help my daughter or keep her safe, it all came to a head and I couldn't stop crying, sobbing really, those kinds of moments that the sheer pain of it all overcomes you and the dam breaks and it all comes pouring out. As painful as those moments are, they are cathartic and release all the pent up feelings so that equilibrium can once again reign. That moment for me was hard to feel, but it freed me of those harbored emotions. Perhaps, after all this time of you dealing with the incident your difficult child experienced at the hands of others has left you feeling powerless as well and if it fits for you, you might attempt to uncover those buried feelings and allow them to come up, maybe in the form of tears. Crying, although not any fun at all, has been proven to lower the stress levels and bring balance back into the body, mind and spirit. It sounds as if you may have many different feelings going on, all surfacing as rage. Just a thought for you to consider. I wish you peace and send you hugs........... [/QUOTE]
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