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Hello and meet Satanica....
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<blockquote data-quote="AnnieO" data-source="post: 374172" data-attributes="member: 6705"><p>Boogie - first things first - HUGS!</p><p>I have been where you are. I have been so depressed and frustrated at the system's failure to help "my" child, and husband's denial and BM's continued allegations that Onyxx's problems are <strong><em>all</em></strong> husband's fault... I did notice you mentioned Onyxx in the first post. The difference - as I see it - is that Onyxx is fully capable of behaving. Demonica may not be.</p><p>Of course, saying that - means she seriously seriously needs help. Now, I had never heard of a neuropsychologist before either. What we (husband and I) did was start with the local Children's hospital, and ask for referrals. We ended up in the next big city, at <em>their</em> Children's, which is over an hour drive - but luckily only just. Jett has been evaluated and his diagnosis is on my signature. As for Onyxx, husband is still somewhat in denial (though better now), so that's not been even touched.</p><p>Your posts show how frustrated you are. It's hard - especially when you do love the children - to be a step parent. You don't have <strong>any</strong> rights, but you have all the responsibilities. How does your wife handle this? Are you on the same page re Demonica, or is Fastone demonstrating ostrich tendencies?</p><p>There are times when all I want is some peace, and I would be willing to bet that describes you, as well. Some time to enjoy your home, and your wife, without living in your own prison on lockdown or being terrorized. The sad truth is that the "system" doesn't work very well for our kids. House arrest is more punishment for the parents (and siblings) than the children.</p><p>I've been told to take all threats 100% seriously. I do, and so should you. Having a video/recording of Demonica's threats will help you. The state CAN order Residential Treatment Center (RTC), they just don't like to because then they have to pay for it (your wife will likely have to pay child support).</p><p>Which brings me to the next thing... How is Fastone's relationship with her XH, in re the kids? When they split, was it fairly amicable or was it extremely contentious? Most of us steps have very, very biased opinions about our spouses' exes - and I can say that I tried very hard to play peacemaker where BM is concerned, until 1) she attacked ME and MY FAMILY (false allegations... According to her I have been arrested multiple times for DUI... LOL, never been arrested for ANYTHING... This is just an example), and 2) she exhibited EXACTLY the behaviors I was hearing about from husband and his family.</p><p>In the meantime, I'll lend you my rhino skin, because I have noticed that the more you lend it to others the thicker your own gets.</p><p>Stay with us... HUGS!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="AnnieO, post: 374172, member: 6705"] Boogie - first things first - HUGS! I have been where you are. I have been so depressed and frustrated at the system's failure to help "my" child, and husband's denial and BM's continued allegations that Onyxx's problems are [B][I]all[/I][/B] husband's fault... I did notice you mentioned Onyxx in the first post. The difference - as I see it - is that Onyxx is fully capable of behaving. Demonica may not be. Of course, saying that - means she seriously seriously needs help. Now, I had never heard of a neuropsychologist before either. What we (husband and I) did was start with the local Children's hospital, and ask for referrals. We ended up in the next big city, at [I]their[/I] Children's, which is over an hour drive - but luckily only just. Jett has been evaluated and his diagnosis is on my signature. As for Onyxx, husband is still somewhat in denial (though better now), so that's not been even touched. Your posts show how frustrated you are. It's hard - especially when you do love the children - to be a step parent. You don't have [B]any[/B] rights, but you have all the responsibilities. How does your wife handle this? Are you on the same page re Demonica, or is Fastone demonstrating ostrich tendencies? There are times when all I want is some peace, and I would be willing to bet that describes you, as well. Some time to enjoy your home, and your wife, without living in your own prison on lockdown or being terrorized. The sad truth is that the "system" doesn't work very well for our kids. House arrest is more punishment for the parents (and siblings) than the children. I've been told to take all threats 100% seriously. I do, and so should you. Having a video/recording of Demonica's threats will help you. The state CAN order Residential Treatment Center (RTC), they just don't like to because then they have to pay for it (your wife will likely have to pay child support). Which brings me to the next thing... How is Fastone's relationship with her XH, in re the kids? When they split, was it fairly amicable or was it extremely contentious? Most of us steps have very, very biased opinions about our spouses' exes - and I can say that I tried very hard to play peacemaker where BM is concerned, until 1) she attacked ME and MY FAMILY (false allegations... According to her I have been arrested multiple times for DUI... LOL, never been arrested for ANYTHING... This is just an example), and 2) she exhibited EXACTLY the behaviors I was hearing about from husband and his family. In the meantime, I'll lend you my rhino skin, because I have noticed that the more you lend it to others the thicker your own gets. Stay with us... HUGS! [/QUOTE]
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