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Help! Divorced and I disagree with ex and the doctors
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<blockquote data-quote="firehorsewoman" data-source="post: 525942"><p>Thanks to all for the advice especially to Susiestar for the link to the form. I try to go to the appointments with my ex but if I am going many times he will not. If I cannot make it, then I type a letter for him to give to the doctors. The last appointment was five weeks ago and we were both there. The person we saw that day (a fellow-since it is Texas Children's hospital we see different people, residents etc and then the attending doctor usually makes an appearance but she was out of town so they had another senior doctor take her place after the fellow became overwhelmed by us) seemed totally overwhelmed by our situation.</p><p></p><p>I first started educating myself on conduct disorders six years ago and was pretty active on this site but under the name tiredcheryl. I am in no way an expert but not a newbie either. Also, my nephew in another state has Aspergers and sensory processing disorder (SPD) so I read up on those too. My son's first neurologist thought that he had sensory stuff going on and wanted him to see an Occupational Therapist (OT) but between all of his other appointments and the divorce it never happened. I have put this all in writing to his current doctors (also at TCH) and they ignore me. My ex does not believe that our son has anything besides ADHD. I remind him how our son is always taking his shoes off, can't stand to have one drop of water on his clothes or must change, is sensitive to noise and light, but he just doesn't see it.</p><p>His neuropsychologist exam done at TCH about a year ago was supposed to be complete. So, his doctors and my ex do not see any need for further testing. </p><p>As far as the Risperdal goes, I believe that they are covering their butts by not giving it because of the elevated prolactin. I think we should treat the patient and not the labwork. My son was not growing breasts nor lactating. Elevated prolactin is not that scary a risk in itself. I would like to put him back on it and of course monitor prolactin and physical symptoms closely. But they refuse.</p><p>He has another appointment this coming Friday and I will try to go depending on my work schedule. I wish that it were mandatory for both of us to be there in the same room with the doctors at each appointment.</p><p>The thing that I just can't get across to them is the degree and frequency of the meltdowns this kid has. I am going to start videotaping them. </p><p>We have joint conservatorship with my ex having primary custody. I get them about ten days a month. We arranged it that way because my ex works for himself and has a flexible schedule, he has a very involved mother and a wife at his beck and call. I have no family or friends in this area to help me, work very long hours, and decided that they were better off with their dad than with a nanny. </p><p></p><p>Having a child like this is difficult even under the best circumstances but when you do not get along nor communicate with the other parent it exponentially worse. </p><p></p><p>thanks for the advice!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="firehorsewoman, post: 525942"] Thanks to all for the advice especially to Susiestar for the link to the form. I try to go to the appointments with my ex but if I am going many times he will not. If I cannot make it, then I type a letter for him to give to the doctors. The last appointment was five weeks ago and we were both there. The person we saw that day (a fellow-since it is Texas Children's hospital we see different people, residents etc and then the attending doctor usually makes an appearance but she was out of town so they had another senior doctor take her place after the fellow became overwhelmed by us) seemed totally overwhelmed by our situation. I first started educating myself on conduct disorders six years ago and was pretty active on this site but under the name tiredcheryl. I am in no way an expert but not a newbie either. Also, my nephew in another state has Aspergers and sensory processing disorder (SPD) so I read up on those too. My son's first neurologist thought that he had sensory stuff going on and wanted him to see an Occupational Therapist (OT) but between all of his other appointments and the divorce it never happened. I have put this all in writing to his current doctors (also at TCH) and they ignore me. My ex does not believe that our son has anything besides ADHD. I remind him how our son is always taking his shoes off, can't stand to have one drop of water on his clothes or must change, is sensitive to noise and light, but he just doesn't see it. His neuropsychologist exam done at TCH about a year ago was supposed to be complete. So, his doctors and my ex do not see any need for further testing. As far as the Risperdal goes, I believe that they are covering their butts by not giving it because of the elevated prolactin. I think we should treat the patient and not the labwork. My son was not growing breasts nor lactating. Elevated prolactin is not that scary a risk in itself. I would like to put him back on it and of course monitor prolactin and physical symptoms closely. But they refuse. He has another appointment this coming Friday and I will try to go depending on my work schedule. I wish that it were mandatory for both of us to be there in the same room with the doctors at each appointment. The thing that I just can't get across to them is the degree and frequency of the meltdowns this kid has. I am going to start videotaping them. We have joint conservatorship with my ex having primary custody. I get them about ten days a month. We arranged it that way because my ex works for himself and has a flexible schedule, he has a very involved mother and a wife at his beck and call. I have no family or friends in this area to help me, work very long hours, and decided that they were better off with their dad than with a nanny. Having a child like this is difficult even under the best circumstances but when you do not get along nor communicate with the other parent it exponentially worse. thanks for the advice! [/QUOTE]
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