Hi Lindalou,
You have received some very good advice from the others which I agree with.
None of this is easy. Putting off what needs to happen does not benefit anyone. When we are dealing with our adult difficult children it is so important to follow through with what we say. When we don't follow through it creates a small hole in our armor and that is just enough for our d_c's because the next time we say we are going to do something they will not take us seriously.
Your son is 30, at some point he is going to have to do for himself. What's he going to do when you and your husband are no longer here? Your son will manage, they always do.
My son has been homeless/wandering for several years now. There was a time when I didn't think he would make it but he did. He manages. It's not the way I choose for him to live but then again it's his life, not mine.
I'm sorry your husband is having a harder time with this but I am glad that you know what needs to be done and are willing to do it.
Hang in there!!!
Let us know how things go.