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Help! Poor social skills...now I'm afraid to volunteer again
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 608030" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Annie and Susie, thank you. Annie, it's interesting but not surprising that sweet little Rose finally got you attention!!! I'd go up to anyone with a baby as cute as her. Of course, I try very hard not to exclude anyone either because I know how it feels. Good for you for trying. It's embarassing when others just walk away from you. Have been there too.</p><p></p><p>Susie, you are right. Since I am so socially awkward I feel the most at home with the world's misfits and crazies and it gets me into trouble, now that I think about it. Thanks for bringing that up. I expect unstable people to act stable and they usually are ok for a while than implode and often it is on me because I am quiet and passive and look like a pushover. Can a person look like a pushover? YES!!!! </p><p></p><p>I remember making a friend that I had an instant connection with. We really bonded fast. But she told me she hated people, had all sorts of mental disorders, and liked to be alone. We did some animal rescue together, which was out bond. I soon found out she got very tired of the animals she rescued and would hand them out to a lot of her acquaintances just to get rid of them and many of her acquaintances were problematic, such as ex-felons or possible drug users. She didn't use drugs or ever go to jail, but she liked people who did. Finally, she imploded on me and I felt horrible (again). When she was nice, she was a doll. When she forgot to take her medications, she screamed at everyone. </p><p></p><p>Susie, you made me feel better. Although it is not the entirety of my social issues, I do tend to pick unstable people to trust and to break bread with and then I am devestated when they act their part. It occured to me that maybe Jane thought I was a goody-two-shoes because I've never been in jail, don't smoke (everyone else there did) and have never been a substance abuser (almost everyone who volunteered there had been). The head of the place did tell me I was a good, sweet, compassionate person but that I just didn't fit in. Maybe it was a good thing?</p><p></p><p>My worst problem now is that that volunteer place was a lot of fun and now I'm kind of looking for a replacement. I still have some activities going on and I did join a Bible Study (I could use a little religion right now), but that particular volunteer time was three days a week and nothing else I'm doing right now takes up that much time. </p><p></p><p>Susie, I have to say your words have helped me more than anything I've read or heard, even from my therapist. I thank you with all my heart. I wish I could give you a real life hug. But I'm grateful to every single person who took the time to listen to my whine and to answer and every single post helped me out a little bit. I will still struggle a bit longer, but I am used to weird stuff happening. Eventually it won't hurt anyone. Head Start no longer does. Sending prayers and love to those who believe and good vibes and warmth to those who are just good people hanging out here <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 608030, member: 1550"] Annie and Susie, thank you. Annie, it's interesting but not surprising that sweet little Rose finally got you attention!!! I'd go up to anyone with a baby as cute as her. Of course, I try very hard not to exclude anyone either because I know how it feels. Good for you for trying. It's embarassing when others just walk away from you. Have been there too. Susie, you are right. Since I am so socially awkward I feel the most at home with the world's misfits and crazies and it gets me into trouble, now that I think about it. Thanks for bringing that up. I expect unstable people to act stable and they usually are ok for a while than implode and often it is on me because I am quiet and passive and look like a pushover. Can a person look like a pushover? YES!!!! I remember making a friend that I had an instant connection with. We really bonded fast. But she told me she hated people, had all sorts of mental disorders, and liked to be alone. We did some animal rescue together, which was out bond. I soon found out she got very tired of the animals she rescued and would hand them out to a lot of her acquaintances just to get rid of them and many of her acquaintances were problematic, such as ex-felons or possible drug users. She didn't use drugs or ever go to jail, but she liked people who did. Finally, she imploded on me and I felt horrible (again). When she was nice, she was a doll. When she forgot to take her medications, she screamed at everyone. Susie, you made me feel better. Although it is not the entirety of my social issues, I do tend to pick unstable people to trust and to break bread with and then I am devestated when they act their part. It occured to me that maybe Jane thought I was a goody-two-shoes because I've never been in jail, don't smoke (everyone else there did) and have never been a substance abuser (almost everyone who volunteered there had been). The head of the place did tell me I was a good, sweet, compassionate person but that I just didn't fit in. Maybe it was a good thing? My worst problem now is that that volunteer place was a lot of fun and now I'm kind of looking for a replacement. I still have some activities going on and I did join a Bible Study (I could use a little religion right now), but that particular volunteer time was three days a week and nothing else I'm doing right now takes up that much time. Susie, I have to say your words have helped me more than anything I've read or heard, even from my therapist. I thank you with all my heart. I wish I could give you a real life hug. But I'm grateful to every single person who took the time to listen to my whine and to answer and every single post helped me out a little bit. I will still struggle a bit longer, but I am used to weird stuff happening. Eventually it won't hurt anyone. Head Start no longer does. Sending prayers and love to those who believe and good vibes and warmth to those who are just good people hanging out here :) [/QUOTE]
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Help! Poor social skills...now I'm afraid to volunteer again
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