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Help requested by new member - sorry if this has been covered elsewhere!
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<blockquote data-quote="strugglingwithgirls" data-source="post: 492755" data-attributes="member: 13478"><p>Hi MidwestMom</p><p></p><p>Thank you for your words of advice - Al-Anon and Narc-Anon are no good for my daughter or myself since they are faith-based and I know my daughter does not believe in organised religion (similar to my own beliefs). That is not to say that we are not spiritual or 'good people' but I think generally in the UK religion/spirituality is much more personal and not based on a belief in 'God' as such, although I have respect for those that do believe. </p><p></p><p>I am worried if I tell my daughter I looked at her FB it will be the catalyst for total lack of communication - her boyfriend has already asked her why she hasn't already cut me out of her life completely and she is some way to doing this already - I find it hard to contact her generally unless she needs something from me, such as money, etc. I just feel after our time at Christmas she is some way towards understanding my perspective - something her boyfriend had a go at her about, saying 'what the f*** did it matter what I thought about anything' but she did argue with him about that saying it was important to her that she could come home and that he could come with her, even if she didn't totally stand up for me! I just want to be supportive and reasonable I think so that she feels she can talk to me without it becoming a drama. I think if I tell her I've looked at her FB page it will become a big drama and give him all the fodder he needs. I just wish I'd never looked at it! Although I would still be stressed at least I wouldn't know she was planning to take LSD!</p><p></p><p>D</p><p>x</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="strugglingwithgirls, post: 492755, member: 13478"] Hi MidwestMom Thank you for your words of advice - Al-Anon and Narc-Anon are no good for my daughter or myself since they are faith-based and I know my daughter does not believe in organised religion (similar to my own beliefs). That is not to say that we are not spiritual or 'good people' but I think generally in the UK religion/spirituality is much more personal and not based on a belief in 'God' as such, although I have respect for those that do believe. I am worried if I tell my daughter I looked at her FB it will be the catalyst for total lack of communication - her boyfriend has already asked her why she hasn't already cut me out of her life completely and she is some way to doing this already - I find it hard to contact her generally unless she needs something from me, such as money, etc. I just feel after our time at Christmas she is some way towards understanding my perspective - something her boyfriend had a go at her about, saying 'what the f*** did it matter what I thought about anything' but she did argue with him about that saying it was important to her that she could come home and that he could come with her, even if she didn't totally stand up for me! I just want to be supportive and reasonable I think so that she feels she can talk to me without it becoming a drama. I think if I tell her I've looked at her FB page it will become a big drama and give him all the fodder he needs. I just wish I'd never looked at it! Although I would still be stressed at least I wouldn't know she was planning to take LSD! D x [/QUOTE]
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