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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 472170" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Ok, welcome to the board again. Sorry you had to come back.</p><p></p><p>I'm familiar with Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) and adoption. I adopted several kids and one had to leave because he sexually abused my younger kids and it was too late for him. Perhaps it is not too late for your little guy, but is he getting any Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) therapy? I am guessing that somewhere in his life's history, somebody sexually abused him the way he says he abused somebody else. I was told 99% of all foster kids suffered sexual abuse and I believe it. Sometimes they act out so you have to be careful with any other kids in the house. Was he exposed to drugs and alcohol while his birthmother was pregnant? That also causes big issues. Kids who we adopt at older ages already have horrible histories and we learned the hard way that love is not enough. Many of these kids don't want love. And they also don't feel love. Tell us more about his past.</p><p></p><p>I have a few questions:</p><p>1/How does he treat animals? Has he ever tried to harm one that you know of?</p><p>2/Does he poop or pee in inappropriate places?</p><p>3/Is he interested in fire? Ever set a fire or small fires?</p><p></p><p>These are the three red flags for serious attachment/antisocial issues in children. We learned all this after our adopted son was taken from our house (at our request). He was subsequently charged by the court (NOT at our request) of sexual abuse of a minor (he was 11 and our daughter was 3). He was found guilty and placed in an Residential Treatment Center (RTC) for young sexual predators.</p><p></p><p>One last thing: Your son certainly has hurt somebody in your family if he steals from you and his older brother. And you can get into trouble if he sexually abuses other children, either at school or in the neighborhood. You are his paernt...and accountable. Sadly, he probably does NOT have a conscience just like the child WE adopted at an older age. Our child was ultimately put into a lockdown Residential Treatment Center (RTC) and diagnosed belatedly with Severe REactive Attachment Disorder although I think he may have had some brain damage too from his birthmother's prenatal drug use and her neglect and abuse of him before he was removed from her care.</p><p></p><p>Others will come along. It is slow on the weekends. There are several adoptive parents here. I'm just one of them.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 472170, member: 1550"] Ok, welcome to the board again. Sorry you had to come back. I'm familiar with Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) and adoption. I adopted several kids and one had to leave because he sexually abused my younger kids and it was too late for him. Perhaps it is not too late for your little guy, but is he getting any Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) therapy? I am guessing that somewhere in his life's history, somebody sexually abused him the way he says he abused somebody else. I was told 99% of all foster kids suffered sexual abuse and I believe it. Sometimes they act out so you have to be careful with any other kids in the house. Was he exposed to drugs and alcohol while his birthmother was pregnant? That also causes big issues. Kids who we adopt at older ages already have horrible histories and we learned the hard way that love is not enough. Many of these kids don't want love. And they also don't feel love. Tell us more about his past. I have a few questions: 1/How does he treat animals? Has he ever tried to harm one that you know of? 2/Does he poop or pee in inappropriate places? 3/Is he interested in fire? Ever set a fire or small fires? These are the three red flags for serious attachment/antisocial issues in children. We learned all this after our adopted son was taken from our house (at our request). He was subsequently charged by the court (NOT at our request) of sexual abuse of a minor (he was 11 and our daughter was 3). He was found guilty and placed in an Residential Treatment Center (RTC) for young sexual predators. One last thing: Your son certainly has hurt somebody in your family if he steals from you and his older brother. And you can get into trouble if he sexually abuses other children, either at school or in the neighborhood. You are his paernt...and accountable. Sadly, he probably does NOT have a conscience just like the child WE adopted at an older age. Our child was ultimately put into a lockdown Residential Treatment Center (RTC) and diagnosed belatedly with Severe REactive Attachment Disorder although I think he may have had some brain damage too from his birthmother's prenatal drug use and her neglect and abuse of him before he was removed from her care. Others will come along. It is slow on the weekends. There are several adoptive parents here. I'm just one of them. [/QUOTE]
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