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Here we go again :(
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<blockquote data-quote="scent of cedar" data-source="post: 595887" data-attributes="member: 1721"><p>Know that we are there with you in spirit, JKF. Do as Recovering suggested. Pray for your child, and place him in God's hands. Remember the Serenity Prayer.</p><p></p><p>God, grant me the Serenity to accept the things I cannot change,</p><p>the Courage to change the things I can,</p><p>And the Wisdom to know the difference.</p><p></p><p>You have made a choice. This is a good and strengthening thing for you and for your family. In a way, this is your first step into a new reality. difficult child has been calling the shots. Now, he is learning that you, in your wisdom and in your love for him, have taken a stand. I think that, painful and confusing as this night will be, your difficult child will come out of this knowing that your expectations are not to be treated casually. There is a reason he is where he is, tonight. He could have made other choices, but he tested the limits. He chose the consequence he is experiencing now. </p><p></p><p>This night is going to be a valuable learning experience for both of you.</p><p></p><p>If you could understand that you made your decision for the good of your difficult child and for the good of your family (which is the truth), you may be able to get through it with less anguish. My experience tells me you will suffer, tonight. But tomorrow, when difficult child turns out to have been fine, when you realize you have taken a stand and, more importantly, have not backed down...I think your relationship to difficult child will change. Perhaps, he will begin to understand that you are determined to see him walk a different, and healthier, path.</p><p></p><p>There is much at stake, tonight. Your task is to survive it. </p><p></p><p>Everything will look different, tomorrow.</p><p></p><p>There are 18 year old soldiers out in the world somewhere right now, too. They are sleeping in the rain, they are cold, they are scared. But they are not where they are because of self-indulgence. They are not there because they missed the curfew at their half-way house.</p><p></p><p>Your difficult child needs to pick up. He needs to step into the man he is becoming. And he needs to do that without blaming or manipulating anyone else for the consequences of his choices.</p><p></p><p>I'm so sorry this is happening to you, and to your son.</p><p></p><p>You deserve better than what he is giving you. He was raised better than to do what he is doing, or you would not be here, on this site.</p><p></p><p>We will all be checking in with you tomorrow, and we will keep your difficult child in our prayers, tonight.</p><p></p><p>But the choice was his to make.</p><p></p><p>Barbara</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="scent of cedar, post: 595887, member: 1721"] Know that we are there with you in spirit, JKF. Do as Recovering suggested. Pray for your child, and place him in God's hands. Remember the Serenity Prayer. God, grant me the Serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the Courage to change the things I can, And the Wisdom to know the difference. You have made a choice. This is a good and strengthening thing for you and for your family. In a way, this is your first step into a new reality. difficult child has been calling the shots. Now, he is learning that you, in your wisdom and in your love for him, have taken a stand. I think that, painful and confusing as this night will be, your difficult child will come out of this knowing that your expectations are not to be treated casually. There is a reason he is where he is, tonight. He could have made other choices, but he tested the limits. He chose the consequence he is experiencing now. This night is going to be a valuable learning experience for both of you. If you could understand that you made your decision for the good of your difficult child and for the good of your family (which is the truth), you may be able to get through it with less anguish. My experience tells me you will suffer, tonight. But tomorrow, when difficult child turns out to have been fine, when you realize you have taken a stand and, more importantly, have not backed down...I think your relationship to difficult child will change. Perhaps, he will begin to understand that you are determined to see him walk a different, and healthier, path. There is much at stake, tonight. Your task is to survive it. Everything will look different, tomorrow. There are 18 year old soldiers out in the world somewhere right now, too. They are sleeping in the rain, they are cold, they are scared. But they are not where they are because of self-indulgence. They are not there because they missed the curfew at their half-way house. Your difficult child needs to pick up. He needs to step into the man he is becoming. And he needs to do that without blaming or manipulating anyone else for the consequences of his choices. I'm so sorry this is happening to you, and to your son. You deserve better than what he is giving you. He was raised better than to do what he is doing, or you would not be here, on this site. We will all be checking in with you tomorrow, and we will keep your difficult child in our prayers, tonight. But the choice was his to make. Barbara [/QUOTE]
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