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He's been kicked out of the shelter
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<blockquote data-quote="Scent of Cedar *" data-source="post: 643598" data-attributes="member: 17461"><p>We have done that. Paid deposit and co-signed. difficult child son did well for quite a long time, the first time. Then, drug use, again. </p><p></p><p>It was the right thing to do at that time.</p><p></p><p>It was the right thing, for us.</p><p></p><p>Your son is young. If you can make a chance for him and if he does well with it, then maybe he can turn this thing he's into now around. That is what you want for him.</p><p></p><p>That is the reason, the real reason, you are doing any of this.</p><p></p><p>So your son will decide to take his life in a better direction.</p><p></p><p>When we look back, we are angry that it didn't work, of course. But we are very glad we did those things. We tried more than once, and we are very glad we did all we knew or could learn to turn things around every time there was an opportunity to do that. Then, there comes a time when you will be ready to let go.</p><p></p><p>That time came for us, too.</p><p></p><p>If things don't turn around, it makes a difference to know you tried.</p><p></p><p>It makes all the difference in the world.</p><p></p><p>When you are ready to pass their lives over to them, however that turns out, it is still hard. But when you know you have done all that you could do <em>when the kids were young enough that it could have made a difference</em>, that helps us know, and accept, that it is time to detach.</p><p></p><p>I agree that it is impossible to stand firm on detaching in the winter.</p><p></p><p>I think the moms who say stick to your guns are right in a way, too. But you can stick to your guns in the Spring, when the issue isn't freezing to death.</p><p></p><p>Cedar</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Scent of Cedar *, post: 643598, member: 17461"] We have done that. Paid deposit and co-signed. difficult child son did well for quite a long time, the first time. Then, drug use, again. It was the right thing to do at that time. It was the right thing, for us. Your son is young. If you can make a chance for him and if he does well with it, then maybe he can turn this thing he's into now around. That is what you want for him. That is the reason, the real reason, you are doing any of this. So your son will decide to take his life in a better direction. When we look back, we are angry that it didn't work, of course. But we are very glad we did those things. We tried more than once, and we are very glad we did all we knew or could learn to turn things around every time there was an opportunity to do that. Then, there comes a time when you will be ready to let go. That time came for us, too. If things don't turn around, it makes a difference to know you tried. It makes all the difference in the world. When you are ready to pass their lives over to them, however that turns out, it is still hard. But when you know you have done all that you could do [I]when the kids were young enough that it could have made a difference[/I], that helps us know, and accept, that it is time to detach. I agree that it is impossible to stand firm on detaching in the winter. I think the moms who say stick to your guns are right in a way, too. But you can stick to your guns in the Spring, when the issue isn't freezing to death. Cedar [/QUOTE]
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