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General Parenting
Hi Newbie here. Venting hoping for advice/commiseration
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<blockquote data-quote="STRESSEDTOMAX" data-source="post: 581835" data-attributes="member: 3512"><p>Hi Trix - My story with difficult child has been almost identical to yours. Turns out, he's on the Autistic Spectrum. After years of going through this (and right now - we're not in a great space) - I truly believe they have very little - no control over the meltdowns once they start. I do want to tell you what our new therapist told me last week - which NO ONE has ever said to me in the eight years we have been seeking help - each time a meltdown happens, Cortisol is released and this can have many damaging affects on the brain. She is sending us to a neurologist. As far as your husband...he sounds like mine. The spankings aren't working. They're not going to. It just makes the situation worse. After YEARS my husband is finally starting to get that this is not flagrant disrespect...it is a condition. Our marriage has taken a huge hit from all of this. One of the things that happened is I would protect my son from spankings and verbal rants from my husband and so it became like me and difficult child "against" husband which wasn't good either. My difficult child is much better with younger children and adults than he is with peers. I was just talking to husband last night about making his room almost like a "padded" room because last night he was threatening to stab himself with a pencil. Right now, we're going through a very aggressive time again: holes in walls, doors, etc. I'm sorry if I'm all over the place here...my thoughts are very scattered right now...that's one reason I haven't been posting...it's hard for me to get a sentence together. You are DEFINITELY in the right place.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="STRESSEDTOMAX, post: 581835, member: 3512"] Hi Trix - My story with difficult child has been almost identical to yours. Turns out, he's on the Autistic Spectrum. After years of going through this (and right now - we're not in a great space) - I truly believe they have very little - no control over the meltdowns once they start. I do want to tell you what our new therapist told me last week - which NO ONE has ever said to me in the eight years we have been seeking help - each time a meltdown happens, Cortisol is released and this can have many damaging affects on the brain. She is sending us to a neurologist. As far as your husband...he sounds like mine. The spankings aren't working. They're not going to. It just makes the situation worse. After YEARS my husband is finally starting to get that this is not flagrant disrespect...it is a condition. Our marriage has taken a huge hit from all of this. One of the things that happened is I would protect my son from spankings and verbal rants from my husband and so it became like me and difficult child "against" husband which wasn't good either. My difficult child is much better with younger children and adults than he is with peers. I was just talking to husband last night about making his room almost like a "padded" room because last night he was threatening to stab himself with a pencil. Right now, we're going through a very aggressive time again: holes in walls, doors, etc. I'm sorry if I'm all over the place here...my thoughts are very scattered right now...that's one reason I haven't been posting...it's hard for me to get a sentence together. You are DEFINITELY in the right place. [/QUOTE]
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Hi Newbie here. Venting hoping for advice/commiseration
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