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hoarding help it's really not good
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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 560151" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>Problems with kids like ours can be complex. The hoarding is an attempt to fill a need. Finding out what that need is and determining healthier ways to deal with it, can take us years. Things we're still discovering with the younger two involve memory and how it is laid down. We've begun getting more effective help from psychologists - cognitive behaviour therapy is good, we also have found a vocational psychologist who has been very helpful. At 7 your son is perhaps still too young for CBT, but it is something to look towards as he gets older. He does need strategies to use, to help him cope and move on.</p><p></p><p>I'm wondering if a different game might be good. We had to ban difficult child 3 from some computer games when he was younger, because he couldn't handle them.</p><p></p><p>I also explained to my kids what nightmares and dreams really are - they're the mind trying to sort through the filing cabinet of the day's combined experiences, while we sleep. The more we have packed in to our day, the more stressed we have been, the more jumbled will be the images. But our mind will keep trying to help us make sense and organise it all. Sometimes talking about it can help us understand what our mind is trying to tell us. But if talking about it is too difficult, then trying to understand it for ourselves, or at least understanding the purpose of dreaming and why sometimes dreams can be vivid and distressing, can also help.</p><p></p><p>A trick I taught my kids for when they have nightmares - if you get woken in the night from a nightmare, roll over onto your other side. I told my kids that the nightmare would trickle out of their other ear when they rolled over. When they went back to sleep the nightmare would have stopped. </p><p></p><p>It is so difficult when they are young, especially, because they have so much to deal with and so little to help them manage.</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 560151, member: 1991"] Problems with kids like ours can be complex. The hoarding is an attempt to fill a need. Finding out what that need is and determining healthier ways to deal with it, can take us years. Things we're still discovering with the younger two involve memory and how it is laid down. We've begun getting more effective help from psychologists - cognitive behaviour therapy is good, we also have found a vocational psychologist who has been very helpful. At 7 your son is perhaps still too young for CBT, but it is something to look towards as he gets older. He does need strategies to use, to help him cope and move on. I'm wondering if a different game might be good. We had to ban difficult child 3 from some computer games when he was younger, because he couldn't handle them. I also explained to my kids what nightmares and dreams really are - they're the mind trying to sort through the filing cabinet of the day's combined experiences, while we sleep. The more we have packed in to our day, the more stressed we have been, the more jumbled will be the images. But our mind will keep trying to help us make sense and organise it all. Sometimes talking about it can help us understand what our mind is trying to tell us. But if talking about it is too difficult, then trying to understand it for ourselves, or at least understanding the purpose of dreaming and why sometimes dreams can be vivid and distressing, can also help. A trick I taught my kids for when they have nightmares - if you get woken in the night from a nightmare, roll over onto your other side. I told my kids that the nightmare would trickle out of their other ear when they rolled over. When they went back to sleep the nightmare would have stopped. It is so difficult when they are young, especially, because they have so much to deal with and so little to help them manage. Marg [/QUOTE]
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