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Homeschooling - am I out of my mind?
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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 386458" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>We found that we didn't really need to worry too much about socialising - difficult child 3 when in mainstream would come home with loads of homework to do; it was a lot of work he had not been able to do during the day. So after holding himself together all day, he got more of it at home and we had meltdowns. The struggle would continue into the night and of course meant he could not go play with friends until the work was done. And it was never done. Once we made the change to school at home, difficult child 3 got the work done during school hours, so he was ready to go play when the neighbourhood kids got home from school.</p><p>The joy of difficult child 3 being able to go visit friends after school - if there is a problem, or another kid there who is bullying him, he can come straight home. He has choice. Also I would often tag along and talk to the parent in the kitchen or in the background, so I was present and that helped my son's friends to learn the early warning signs for when he needed to be sent home. But over time difficult child 3 himself has learned how to remove himself, with no outside help.</p><p></p><p>However, attending after school care is a good idea. Often these arrangements have activity afternoons where play is more directed. These would be the better days to choose, if you can (the circus skills afternoon, or the theatre sports afternoon). We used to go shopping sometimes. Or he could enrol in an after school organisation or activity (tennis club, drama class - which difficult child 3 does - or similar). Directed activity is less likely to cause problems socially.</p><p></p><p>With the failure to get ready (in mainstream) - there's no need, for home schooling, for the child to get dressed if he doesn't want to right away. difficult child 3 often starts his schoolwork while still in his pyjamas. But if someone visits or a tradesman arrives, difficult child 3 gets embarrassed if he's caught in his pyjamas in the middle of the day.</p><p></p><p>WHen the child has some choice and control in areas that don't matter, it's easier to get them to cooperate in areas that do.</p><p></p><p>A suggestion - how about you try this out for a set time - you do have to have some academic material available from somewhere as well as some minimum expectations in terms of outcomes. See how you go and if you feel you're not having the success you hoped for, make sure you can put him back in mainstream when you need to. The measure of success perhaps could be - can we do a better job at home?</p><p></p><p>Easy to assess.</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 386458, member: 1991"] We found that we didn't really need to worry too much about socialising - difficult child 3 when in mainstream would come home with loads of homework to do; it was a lot of work he had not been able to do during the day. So after holding himself together all day, he got more of it at home and we had meltdowns. The struggle would continue into the night and of course meant he could not go play with friends until the work was done. And it was never done. Once we made the change to school at home, difficult child 3 got the work done during school hours, so he was ready to go play when the neighbourhood kids got home from school. The joy of difficult child 3 being able to go visit friends after school - if there is a problem, or another kid there who is bullying him, he can come straight home. He has choice. Also I would often tag along and talk to the parent in the kitchen or in the background, so I was present and that helped my son's friends to learn the early warning signs for when he needed to be sent home. But over time difficult child 3 himself has learned how to remove himself, with no outside help. However, attending after school care is a good idea. Often these arrangements have activity afternoons where play is more directed. These would be the better days to choose, if you can (the circus skills afternoon, or the theatre sports afternoon). We used to go shopping sometimes. Or he could enrol in an after school organisation or activity (tennis club, drama class - which difficult child 3 does - or similar). Directed activity is less likely to cause problems socially. With the failure to get ready (in mainstream) - there's no need, for home schooling, for the child to get dressed if he doesn't want to right away. difficult child 3 often starts his schoolwork while still in his pyjamas. But if someone visits or a tradesman arrives, difficult child 3 gets embarrassed if he's caught in his pyjamas in the middle of the day. WHen the child has some choice and control in areas that don't matter, it's easier to get them to cooperate in areas that do. A suggestion - how about you try this out for a set time - you do have to have some academic material available from somewhere as well as some minimum expectations in terms of outcomes. See how you go and if you feel you're not having the success you hoped for, make sure you can put him back in mainstream when you need to. The measure of success perhaps could be - can we do a better job at home? Easy to assess. Marg [/QUOTE]
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