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Hoping my visit isn't taking us all backwards
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<blockquote data-quote="blackgnat" data-source="post: 631163" data-attributes="member: 13561"><p>I am in Colorado right now and I have, for the most part, loved what I've seen from both of my boys.</p><p></p><p>But now I'm starting to feel that my presence here is weakening the situation.</p><p></p><p>My easy child is so busy with work and school that I'm hardly seeing him. That's good and healthy.</p><p></p><p>My difficult child-I am seeing all the time. I am taking him to drug tests, tb tests, places where he can fill out job applications, back to the shelter where he sleeps, hanging out at his dad's apartment, etc.</p><p></p><p>Even HE is saying, "I'm getting soft", because he is not taking the bus and is getting used to having me around for company.</p><p></p><p>I have only been here 4 days! I am not sure how long to stay because I haven't seen my sons for a year. But I feel that my presence and availability is detrimental to the progress of my difficult child. It's reminding him of how easy life can be with me-always having his needs taken care of...</p><p></p><p>So I'm thinking that 5 more days at the most is a good balance. I think he learned lots of valuable stuff about himself in jail and now I feel I'm helping to UNDO that! How effed up is THAT?</p><p></p><p>Does this make sense?</p><p></p><p>What do you think, guys?</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="blackgnat, post: 631163, member: 13561"] I am in Colorado right now and I have, for the most part, loved what I've seen from both of my boys. But now I'm starting to feel that my presence here is weakening the situation. My easy child is so busy with work and school that I'm hardly seeing him. That's good and healthy. My difficult child-I am seeing all the time. I am taking him to drug tests, tb tests, places where he can fill out job applications, back to the shelter where he sleeps, hanging out at his dad's apartment, etc. Even HE is saying, "I'm getting soft", because he is not taking the bus and is getting used to having me around for company. I have only been here 4 days! I am not sure how long to stay because I haven't seen my sons for a year. But I feel that my presence and availability is detrimental to the progress of my difficult child. It's reminding him of how easy life can be with me-always having his needs taken care of... So I'm thinking that 5 more days at the most is a good balance. I think he learned lots of valuable stuff about himself in jail and now I feel I'm helping to UNDO that! How effed up is THAT? Does this make sense? What do you think, guys? [/QUOTE]
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