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"How can I screw my life up today?"
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<blockquote data-quote="Lil" data-source="post: 659924" data-attributes="member: 17309"><p>Well, that does appear to be his plan...he's got a ticket to go to the internet girlfriend's town, about 150 miles away. Apparently she's willing to put him up in cheap hotels or help him find shelters, etc., until they can get a place together - apparently he can't stay with her. Maybe she still lives at home. I don't know. I didn't ask.</p><p style="text-align: center">********************</p> <p style="text-align: center"></p><p>He knows he'll likely someday have a warrant issued. By the same token, it's municipal cases and those warrants are local. That is to say, they won't bring you in if it's more than 90 miles. So, he's screwing up his life again and he knows it, but it's his choice. I'm done worrying about it. </p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>Hard to tell. He's skinny. He's always been skinny. He's skinnier now than he's ever been. So yeah. He's lost weight. Not a ton, but he hasn't got much to lose. </p><p style="text-align: center">***********************</p><p></p><p>So...here's the plan. He has a train ticket to leave Sunday. I'm going to take him to the train station. Kiss him. Tell him I love him and send him on the way. He doesn't have a warrant yet so I'm doing nothing wrong by taking him to the train. If he takes no action, doesn't contact the court, that's on him. I'll take him to the train. I won't ask any more questions about it. It's his choice. Not my circus...right? </p><p></p><p>The train doesn't stop in the town, but close, and Jabber has a sister that lives one town over so she's agreed to pick him up and take him there. That's it. Help over. His phone will still be turned off. He gets a ride two miles to the train station and some clean laundry from us. He gets a ride from the train station to the town from his aunt as a favor to us. </p><p></p><p>I advised against it. He didn't take that well. His response was basically what difference does it make where he's homeless or if he does his community service? Will it make the sidewalk any softer? </p><p></p><p>Whatever. He's determined. He's leaving. If his aunt didn't give him a ride, he'd still be in that town eventually, even if he had to walk from the train station or beg someone for a bus pass. If I didn't give him a ride to the train station, he'd still find a way and I wouldn't be able to tell him good-bye. I don't approve. He know.</p><p></p><p>He can be homeless across the state. He says he's never coming back. Fine. We can talk to him when he gets a phone. </p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>Exactly.</p><p></p><p>It was not a pleasant meeting this evening. We took him to Perkin's and he ordered two meals. Couldn't even eat one...his stomach has shrunk. Doggie bags. He took mine too - too upset to eat. Being in public was important, since I was entirely too upset. We almost didn't meet him at all tonight because I was so upset. I knew - and Jabber certainly knew - that if we didn't meet him in public we'd end up fighting. As it was I had to excuse myself to go to the ladies and freak out for a few minutes. </p><p></p><p>At one point I told him, "I love you. I want you to be happy. I can't pretend to understand the choices you've made in the last year or so, but what I want is for you to have a good life." or words to that effect.</p><p></p><p>I'm sad. I'm not angry. I told him that too. That I'm disappointed and confused by his actions. </p><p></p><p>Mostly I'm saddened that he totally refuses to take responsibility for his own actions. He won't admit that his situation is in any way his fault. He went on and on about how people lied and stole from him and let him down. He went on and on about how he's tried to make things better. But he hasn't. </p><p></p><p>There's really nothing I can do. So I'll accept it. Accepting this choice is all I can do.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Lil, post: 659924, member: 17309"] Well, that does appear to be his plan...he's got a ticket to go to the internet girlfriend's town, about 150 miles away. Apparently she's willing to put him up in cheap hotels or help him find shelters, etc., until they can get a place together - apparently he can't stay with her. Maybe she still lives at home. I don't know. I didn't ask. [CENTER]******************** [/CENTER] He knows he'll likely someday have a warrant issued. By the same token, it's municipal cases and those warrants are local. That is to say, they won't bring you in if it's more than 90 miles. So, he's screwing up his life again and he knows it, but it's his choice. I'm done worrying about it. Hard to tell. He's skinny. He's always been skinny. He's skinnier now than he's ever been. So yeah. He's lost weight. Not a ton, but he hasn't got much to lose. [CENTER]***********************[/CENTER] So...here's the plan. He has a train ticket to leave Sunday. I'm going to take him to the train station. Kiss him. Tell him I love him and send him on the way. He doesn't have a warrant yet so I'm doing nothing wrong by taking him to the train. If he takes no action, doesn't contact the court, that's on him. I'll take him to the train. I won't ask any more questions about it. It's his choice. Not my circus...right? The train doesn't stop in the town, but close, and Jabber has a sister that lives one town over so she's agreed to pick him up and take him there. That's it. Help over. His phone will still be turned off. He gets a ride two miles to the train station and some clean laundry from us. He gets a ride from the train station to the town from his aunt as a favor to us. I advised against it. He didn't take that well. His response was basically what difference does it make where he's homeless or if he does his community service? Will it make the sidewalk any softer? Whatever. He's determined. He's leaving. If his aunt didn't give him a ride, he'd still be in that town eventually, even if he had to walk from the train station or beg someone for a bus pass. If I didn't give him a ride to the train station, he'd still find a way and I wouldn't be able to tell him good-bye. I don't approve. He know. He can be homeless across the state. He says he's never coming back. Fine. We can talk to him when he gets a phone. Exactly. It was not a pleasant meeting this evening. We took him to Perkin's and he ordered two meals. Couldn't even eat one...his stomach has shrunk. Doggie bags. He took mine too - too upset to eat. Being in public was important, since I was entirely too upset. We almost didn't meet him at all tonight because I was so upset. I knew - and Jabber certainly knew - that if we didn't meet him in public we'd end up fighting. As it was I had to excuse myself to go to the ladies and freak out for a few minutes. At one point I told him, "I love you. I want you to be happy. I can't pretend to understand the choices you've made in the last year or so, but what I want is for you to have a good life." or words to that effect. I'm sad. I'm not angry. I told him that too. That I'm disappointed and confused by his actions. Mostly I'm saddened that he totally refuses to take responsibility for his own actions. He won't admit that his situation is in any way his fault. He went on and on about how people lied and stole from him and let him down. He went on and on about how he's tried to make things better. But he hasn't. There's really nothing I can do. So I'll accept it. Accepting this choice is all I can do. [/QUOTE]
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