You are right TeDo.... They actually do respond to that kind of guidance well. The boys both called me and texted me when Q was in the hospital. One of them asked me in private if Q was going to die. They really do love him. One told me that when Q gets consequences, he thinks we are being too hard on him, he says it breaks his heart when he cries because he feels so bad. That little guy (well not so little, now 5-6 at age 13) actually let Q use his iPod yesterday...his brand new, just had it for a day iPod. Huge risk, but he is just that sweet (and adhd, his own behavior issues at times, but heart of gold). They are really both much better than the little girls who are in the tattle phase of life. They do OK until their "feelings" get hurt, lol. I always defend them but also remind them that he is just being Q. Not trying to hurt them.
I think it is like iwth our difficult child's you tell them once and at that developmental time they take it in and work on whatever you are discussing but you have to do it again when they hit a new developmental phase. I need to take the time to do that with my nieces and nephews again at this new phase for Q and their older developmental levels.
