Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
How do you discipline your children?
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Fran" data-source="post: 137163" data-attributes="member: 3"><p>There were so many days I wanted to revert to a familiar "belt". I imagined myself shaking him until his teeth rattled. I had all the urges to show him that I was in charge by force. It was what I grew up with but I made a conscious decision that I wanted to do it differently. </p><p>You can follow and be submissive because of fear or you can understand and follow because it's in one's best interest. </p><p></p><p>My boys were to speak to me with the same respect that I speak to them. I don't call them names or demean them. I don't disrespect them. They weren't to raise a hand to their parents or hurt each other. They were to remember they were brothers and when they got older they would appreciate that they have each other in a way no one else could ever be. </p><p></p><p>I didn't have a lot of rules. I didn't stress smaller things. Kept the baskets of A,B & C simple. We tried to have positive, fun times with them even if it's for 5min. husband and I saw the bizarre humor of our difficult child. Being able to see some humor relieved the intensity. They also knew there were no idle threats by mom(the meanie) I didn't make empty threats and I didn't use that route unless nothing else worked. I did 3 spanks on the behind before they were 5yrs old if the did not straighten up by the count of 10. It seemed to work. </p><p></p><p>To tell you the truth, difficult child was still very difficult and very oppositional. I figured nothing I did worked. </p><p>Over 18yrs the boys don't talk disrespectfully. There are no police at the door for my son's.(TG)Drugs and alcohol don't seem to be an issue. </p><p>They are courteous and respectful to adults and their peers. They aren't perfect and I would like to see them grow in some additional directions but it's not my job anymore. </p><p></p><p>The plan is always to get them to adulthood to be law abiding, tax paying, independent adults. Some of our teens just make it difficult to see them at that stage. <img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/emoticons/future.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":future:" title="future :future:" data-shortname=":future:" />I tried to remember what the goal was and how was my disciplining getting difficult child or easy child to that goal. </p><p></p><p>There were so many days that I would fantasize doing grave damage to difficult child's backside.<img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/emoticons/devil.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":devil:" title="devil :devil:" data-shortname=":devil:" /> <img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/emoticons/bag.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":bag:" title="bag :bag:" data-shortname=":bag:" /></p><p></p><p>I think discipline is something that should be dealt out with thought and understanding of where a child is developmentally. You hear horror stories of 2 yr olds being beaten for wetting their undies. It's ignorance and a knee jerk reaction.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Fran, post: 137163, member: 3"] There were so many days I wanted to revert to a familiar "belt". I imagined myself shaking him until his teeth rattled. I had all the urges to show him that I was in charge by force. It was what I grew up with but I made a conscious decision that I wanted to do it differently. You can follow and be submissive because of fear or you can understand and follow because it's in one's best interest. My boys were to speak to me with the same respect that I speak to them. I don't call them names or demean them. I don't disrespect them. They weren't to raise a hand to their parents or hurt each other. They were to remember they were brothers and when they got older they would appreciate that they have each other in a way no one else could ever be. I didn't have a lot of rules. I didn't stress smaller things. Kept the baskets of A,B & C simple. We tried to have positive, fun times with them even if it's for 5min. husband and I saw the bizarre humor of our difficult child. Being able to see some humor relieved the intensity. They also knew there were no idle threats by mom(the meanie) I didn't make empty threats and I didn't use that route unless nothing else worked. I did 3 spanks on the behind before they were 5yrs old if the did not straighten up by the count of 10. It seemed to work. To tell you the truth, difficult child was still very difficult and very oppositional. I figured nothing I did worked. Over 18yrs the boys don't talk disrespectfully. There are no police at the door for my son's.(TG)Drugs and alcohol don't seem to be an issue. They are courteous and respectful to adults and their peers. They aren't perfect and I would like to see them grow in some additional directions but it's not my job anymore. The plan is always to get them to adulthood to be law abiding, tax paying, independent adults. Some of our teens just make it difficult to see them at that stage. :future:I tried to remember what the goal was and how was my disciplining getting difficult child or easy child to that goal. There were so many days that I would fantasize doing grave damage to difficult child's backside.:devil: :bag: I think discipline is something that should be dealt out with thought and understanding of where a child is developmentally. You hear horror stories of 2 yr olds being beaten for wetting their undies. It's ignorance and a knee jerk reaction. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
How do you discipline your children?
Top