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How do you handle clueless questions about your difficult child?
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<blockquote data-quote="DammitJanet" data-source="post: 374668" data-attributes="member: 1514"><p>I got asked to do when talking about making friends about something similar to this topic. I said that I didnt have any in real life, living breathing people who lived in my town that I could consider a BFF. I have acquaintances. I have people I run into and say Hi, I have people that have met me through something like work or something but I dont have that close bond with anyone other than a few people here and my therapist. (and she gets paid to be my friend...lol) </p><p></p><p>I was asked why I think its important for people to understand all the parts of my life to be a true friend. I was taken aback by the question. I dont see how I could feel comfortable talking freely to someone who doesnt understand what I have gone through and had similar situations. I dont think a person who raised pretty well perfect kids who never gave them an ounce of trouble except maybe getting a B on a test can imagine living through seeing your kid in shackles. I dont think anyone who is rail thin and healthy as a horse can imagine what it feels like to know your body is falling apart and you cant fix it. I dont know what its like to have sisters or brothers so I cant imagine the pain of losing one of them. I look at my boys and think they would be devestated. </p><p></p><p>I see people who seem to have fairly normal lives with maybe a bump or two but they think life is upsetting if their cabinets are not arranged by size and type. Their kids all got full ride scholarships to major universities. And I just need to buck up and think brighter thoughts and things will be better. ohhhh Kayyyy! </p><p></p><p>It doesnt do me much good to let it all hang out because in real life it scares people. I tried it once and people were horrified that I could feel so awful about my own son. I found it odd that people dont feel very angry at their kids from time to time. I didnt threaten to kill him...I dont think. I might have. I cant remember its been a long time ago. I was really angry, he really ticked me off over something. It wasnt hard back then. You guys understand just how badly our kids can push us. Cory had pushed me and I went off. I thought I was in a safe place. Obviously I wasnt. They thought I had completely lost my marbles. </p><p></p><p>I still have yet to find someone I feel safe enough to be that open with locally. I doubt I ever do.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DammitJanet, post: 374668, member: 1514"] I got asked to do when talking about making friends about something similar to this topic. I said that I didnt have any in real life, living breathing people who lived in my town that I could consider a BFF. I have acquaintances. I have people I run into and say Hi, I have people that have met me through something like work or something but I dont have that close bond with anyone other than a few people here and my therapist. (and she gets paid to be my friend...lol) I was asked why I think its important for people to understand all the parts of my life to be a true friend. I was taken aback by the question. I dont see how I could feel comfortable talking freely to someone who doesnt understand what I have gone through and had similar situations. I dont think a person who raised pretty well perfect kids who never gave them an ounce of trouble except maybe getting a B on a test can imagine living through seeing your kid in shackles. I dont think anyone who is rail thin and healthy as a horse can imagine what it feels like to know your body is falling apart and you cant fix it. I dont know what its like to have sisters or brothers so I cant imagine the pain of losing one of them. I look at my boys and think they would be devestated. I see people who seem to have fairly normal lives with maybe a bump or two but they think life is upsetting if their cabinets are not arranged by size and type. Their kids all got full ride scholarships to major universities. And I just need to buck up and think brighter thoughts and things will be better. ohhhh Kayyyy! It doesnt do me much good to let it all hang out because in real life it scares people. I tried it once and people were horrified that I could feel so awful about my own son. I found it odd that people dont feel very angry at their kids from time to time. I didnt threaten to kill him...I dont think. I might have. I cant remember its been a long time ago. I was really angry, he really ticked me off over something. It wasnt hard back then. You guys understand just how badly our kids can push us. Cory had pushed me and I went off. I thought I was in a safe place. Obviously I wasnt. They thought I had completely lost my marbles. I still have yet to find someone I feel safe enough to be that open with locally. I doubt I ever do. [/QUOTE]
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How do you handle clueless questions about your difficult child?
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