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General Parenting
How do you handle defiance? Take things away?
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<blockquote data-quote="InsaneCdn" data-source="post: 457346" data-attributes="member: 11791"><p>Your situation has one more challenge.</p><p>I'm guessing here, but YOUR mom was probably quite young (early 20s?) when she had Niece's mom... and Niece's mom had her young as well?</p><p>If so... YOUR Mom is probably closer to MY age than to the age of most of the Moms of your Niece's friends. That is - half way between "parent age" and "grandparent age".</p><p>Which gives your mom the same problem I deal with all the time... </p><p>The other Moms are late-30's to early-40s. I'm a decade older. They just don't relate to ANYTHING I do or say... we might as well be from different planets!</p><p>This complicates things because its hard to form relationships with your kids' peers' parents. Which makes it harder to be on the same page...</p><p></p><p>The friend's mom probably thinks your mom is insane for putting so many restrictions in place.</p><p>Compared to when your mom was growing up, she's being immensely lenient.</p><p>Compared to the peer-mom level of thinking... she might as well be from the 1800s - old, ancient, backward, not "with it". etc.</p><p></p><p>My mom did the 'tolerate the other kids' thing... but we had an unfinished basement, and if we spilled paint or whatever, it wasn't a big deal. (Spilled milk was - because its hard to get rid of the smell, concrete absorbs liquid!)</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="InsaneCdn, post: 457346, member: 11791"] Your situation has one more challenge. I'm guessing here, but YOUR mom was probably quite young (early 20s?) when she had Niece's mom... and Niece's mom had her young as well? If so... YOUR Mom is probably closer to MY age than to the age of most of the Moms of your Niece's friends. That is - half way between "parent age" and "grandparent age". Which gives your mom the same problem I deal with all the time... The other Moms are late-30's to early-40s. I'm a decade older. They just don't relate to ANYTHING I do or say... we might as well be from different planets! This complicates things because its hard to form relationships with your kids' peers' parents. Which makes it harder to be on the same page... The friend's mom probably thinks your mom is insane for putting so many restrictions in place. Compared to when your mom was growing up, she's being immensely lenient. Compared to the peer-mom level of thinking... she might as well be from the 1800s - old, ancient, backward, not "with it". etc. My mom did the 'tolerate the other kids' thing... but we had an unfinished basement, and if we spilled paint or whatever, it wasn't a big deal. (Spilled milk was - because its hard to get rid of the smell, concrete absorbs liquid!) [/QUOTE]
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How do you handle defiance? Take things away?
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