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General Parenting
How do you handle defiance? Take things away?
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<blockquote data-quote="KTMom91" data-source="post: 457398" data-attributes="member: 4040"><p>I also paid Miss KT per job, even if I had to invent a job for her. I was so afraid she inherited her father's "uselessness" gene that I started this when she was very young. Her first paying job (at 5) was to gather up the newspapers and take them out to the bin. I read two papers a day, so every day, there was paper to be gathered. She earned 25 cents a day, which gave her a decent haul for the Friday snack bar at school. </p><p></p><p>Another logical consequence was that I refused to replace anything that was willfully destroyed. She had to work for the money - either at home, at Nana's, or Grandma's. When I asked her to pick up the toys from the yard, she threw them over the fence...her bike helmet included. I think she was 7. No helmet means no riding. She got on the phone and lined up some cleaning at my mom's and gardening at Grandma's. When she got her cell phone (at 12), we agreed that we would replace it once due to unforeseen circumstances. After that, she had to figure it out. And this ruling is why, about 7 years after the fact, she still has no bedroom door because she tore it off the hinges and threw it at me.</p><p></p><p>If your niece is interested in food and cooking, maybe taking a cooking class with your mom would be a good thing. There are several places around here where you go in and make a week's worth of dinners, then bring them home and freeze them for later in the week. And that could lead to trips to Farmer's Markets, learning how to be a "locavore," and different ways to be eco-friendly. Miss KT says this is a big thing now with the college kids.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="KTMom91, post: 457398, member: 4040"] I also paid Miss KT per job, even if I had to invent a job for her. I was so afraid she inherited her father's "uselessness" gene that I started this when she was very young. Her first paying job (at 5) was to gather up the newspapers and take them out to the bin. I read two papers a day, so every day, there was paper to be gathered. She earned 25 cents a day, which gave her a decent haul for the Friday snack bar at school. Another logical consequence was that I refused to replace anything that was willfully destroyed. She had to work for the money - either at home, at Nana's, or Grandma's. When I asked her to pick up the toys from the yard, she threw them over the fence...her bike helmet included. I think she was 7. No helmet means no riding. She got on the phone and lined up some cleaning at my mom's and gardening at Grandma's. When she got her cell phone (at 12), we agreed that we would replace it once due to unforeseen circumstances. After that, she had to figure it out. And this ruling is why, about 7 years after the fact, she still has no bedroom door because she tore it off the hinges and threw it at me. If your niece is interested in food and cooking, maybe taking a cooking class with your mom would be a good thing. There are several places around here where you go in and make a week's worth of dinners, then bring them home and freeze them for later in the week. And that could lead to trips to Farmer's Markets, learning how to be a "locavore," and different ways to be eco-friendly. Miss KT says this is a big thing now with the college kids. [/QUOTE]
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How do you handle defiance? Take things away?
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