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How has your difficult child's addiction problems affected your views on alcohol
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<blockquote data-quote="CrazyinVA" data-source="post: 487779" data-attributes="member: 1157"><p>Thankfully neither of my difficult children appears to have an alcohol addiction, although there have been times I've wondered. Their father was (is) an alcoholic. My mother was an alcoholic. My 2nd husband and two of my ex boyfriends were also alcoholics (one recovering who never relapsed, but still). So, I know about alcoholism, and the havoc it causes, all too well. However, I still drink socially. If someone looked at my Facebook page, they'd probably think I drink a lot more than I do, because many of my pictures are from outings with friends that show drinking.. not to mention I run a craft beer club. (I love craft beer.) But the truth is I never drink at home unless I have people over, and when out, I rarely drink more than a couple because I'm usually driving. I also don't like to be drunk. A buzz, maybe, but I've never understood the urge to get totally out of control. I'm extremely sensitive to red flags for alcoholism, because of my history, and I won't date someone or be close friends with anyone who has alcohol issues. However, I don't want to date someone who doesn't drink, either. A bit of a conflict, I suppose. </p><p></p><p>That being said, when my kids were living at home, I didn't keep much in the house at all. I had parties occasionally where adults drank, and once when Youngest was a teenager she stole some tequila someone had left in my freezer. I took all the alcohol out of my house after that and gave it away. I do believe that it's important to model responsible drinking to young folks, in general... they need to see that not all alcohol consumption leads to alcoholism. But if a kid is showing an issue with it? Nope, not in my house while they're there. </p><p></p><p>So, in some ways, dealing with addiction has made me hypersensitive, especially when it comes to dating... but it hasn't caused me to be a tee-totaller, either. The alcoholics I know in recovery, would never expect someone not to drink in front of them. That doesn't mean they hang out in bars with drinking all around them, but they know that someone ordering a glass of wine at dinner is "normal," and that they have to learn to live with that, and to deal with it. That may be why your friend giving you the bottle of wine didn't think it was a big deal. Everyone's "normal" is different.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="CrazyinVA, post: 487779, member: 1157"] Thankfully neither of my difficult children appears to have an alcohol addiction, although there have been times I've wondered. Their father was (is) an alcoholic. My mother was an alcoholic. My 2nd husband and two of my ex boyfriends were also alcoholics (one recovering who never relapsed, but still). So, I know about alcoholism, and the havoc it causes, all too well. However, I still drink socially. If someone looked at my Facebook page, they'd probably think I drink a lot more than I do, because many of my pictures are from outings with friends that show drinking.. not to mention I run a craft beer club. (I love craft beer.) But the truth is I never drink at home unless I have people over, and when out, I rarely drink more than a couple because I'm usually driving. I also don't like to be drunk. A buzz, maybe, but I've never understood the urge to get totally out of control. I'm extremely sensitive to red flags for alcoholism, because of my history, and I won't date someone or be close friends with anyone who has alcohol issues. However, I don't want to date someone who doesn't drink, either. A bit of a conflict, I suppose. That being said, when my kids were living at home, I didn't keep much in the house at all. I had parties occasionally where adults drank, and once when Youngest was a teenager she stole some tequila someone had left in my freezer. I took all the alcohol out of my house after that and gave it away. I do believe that it's important to model responsible drinking to young folks, in general... they need to see that not all alcohol consumption leads to alcoholism. But if a kid is showing an issue with it? Nope, not in my house while they're there. So, in some ways, dealing with addiction has made me hypersensitive, especially when it comes to dating... but it hasn't caused me to be a tee-totaller, either. The alcoholics I know in recovery, would never expect someone not to drink in front of them. That doesn't mean they hang out in bars with drinking all around them, but they know that someone ordering a glass of wine at dinner is "normal," and that they have to learn to live with that, and to deal with it. That may be why your friend giving you the bottle of wine didn't think it was a big deal. Everyone's "normal" is different. [/QUOTE]
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