Blue, I have learned that quiet can be good and I need to let him be quiet without my chatter, advice, thoughts, questions.
And sad is natural. I haven't seen my son sad much actually. Your son should be sad at the choices he has made and where they have landed him.
The alternative to sad is victim behavior or blaming behavior and arrogant behavior. That mix is what I have seen for years from my difficult child.
Today, he is quieter when I am with him. I am reading that as progress. Or maybe not. But it sure is different.
Keep your distance from him today if you can while still being loving and supportive. What that looks like for me, today, is this:
not saying very much, smiling and hugging him, saying I love you, listening if he wants to talk, not asking questions, giving advice, yelling, controlling and managing, saying I know you can make good decisions for yourself.
Just some thoughts. Please, take what you like and leave the rest. I hope things are okay for you and for him today and that good things are in the future.
