I heard someone once say that they are only as happy as their most miserable child and boy can I relate to that. Even if I'm "letting go", it's always there with me. Not to discourage you, but my son is now 31 and his hard core drug additions started when he was 19. Probably sooner, but that's when I became aware that he was on meth. What a devastating day that was...I'll never forget it. He's moved on to Heroin and is homeless. I can't drive around the community without wondering if I'll spot him. He's in jail a regular basis and I just keep hoping they keep him. The most time he's done at one time is 11 months. I thought that would have "done it", really taught him. But no, he's not done. The drug really has him. I try to prepare myself that this could be it, just the way it's going to be. That doesn't make the pain go away, but it allows me to keep moving, doing the next best thing I can to have a good life for myself. I'm in a constant state of prayer. Praying for my son, for all of the other struggling addicts and all the other parents like myself. We're definitely not alone. Hang in there. As long as they're alive, there is always hope. I recommend reading "Stay Close" by Libby Cataldi. It really helped me a lot. Hugs-Carri
