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husband...Biodad....Jealousy...AARRRGGGHHH!!!
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<blockquote data-quote="ShakespeareMamaX" data-source="post: 131210" data-attributes="member: 3861"><p>The more and more I look at my husband, the more and more I see my ex in the beginning. I <em>have</em> gotten to the point where, if he told me he was leaving, I'd open the door. I've told him not to come home for things, such as, yelling at me for "complaining" and interrupting his time with his friends when he had gone out one night. I called him at 3am. He said I was being mean and he was in a convo, and got off the phone with me. I called between 4 and 4:30am (my legs were in wicked pain). I just wanted him to come home so I could take a bath (I was scared as I had fallen asleep in the tub for an hour last time). He wouldn't answer so, at 4:30, I told him to not give a #@$! somewhere else and don't come home. I locked the door and when he came home (of course) at 5:30am, he threatened to break the door open if I didn't open it for him. He made fun of me and told me I wasn't sick. It was all in my head. A little while later, he went to sleep.</p><p></p><p>We tried counseling once (this is after I had threatened to leave). It was unsuccessful and would be surprised if my therapist could ever get our marriage to work. He said my husband seems to live in his own little world of "he's right", he's not integrated with the family, etc... I made another appointment 20 Mar, but that's a long time away.</p><p></p><p>All of my friends who see us are leaning (heavily) towards control issues. They went as far as saying he's avoiding fixing my car, so I have to depend on him even more. </p><p></p><p>I've explained that using ex's car would be best, since I wouldn't be seeing him. husband didn't care. It's his and he doesn't want me to have anything to do with him. Again, he'd rather I walk to my son's school, than use ex's car or get a ride from ex...</p><p></p><p>Ex does pay support and, in fact, it is kind of deducted from what he owes me, for gas money. husband doesn't care, though. He can't believe he is just a "taxi" to me when I get rides from him. *sigh* I dunno...</p><p></p><p>And for the record... Let's not be heartless here. I'll make a list of positives about husband:</p><p></p><p>1. Sometimes he gets me random presents from the stores he goes to (i.e. a bottle of pomegranate juice, a metal magazine rack for the bathroom, etc...).</p><p></p><p>2. About every other month, he'll take the kids out and let me sleep for a morning on the weekend.</p><p></p><p>3. He helps discipline difficult child, sometimes.</p><p></p><p>Brain...shutting...down...</p><p></p><p>I'm sorry. It's hard for me to think. I'll answer about difficult child as best I can and then I have to stop writing. My head's killing me.</p><p></p><p>I've talked to difficult child's school many many times about their stupidity. I had to tell them, recently, that I can no longer drive, so they need to take it easy. Luckily, this has deterred them from demanding I go there everyday, but they still want me to come in for a meeting. Mind you, last time I went in to have a meeting with the principal and social worker, when i got there, the principal was on lunch duty and the social worker wasn't even in the school, anymore.</p><p></p><p>lately, the principal's been telling me how they're going to look at the iep to do some things in that plan. what?! you're waiting 'til NOW to practice the plan?!?!?!</p><p></p><p>*sigh* I'm so happy we're moving out of this town. I'm hoping it will be better for difficult child and not disrupt him to the point of acting out even more...</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="ShakespeareMamaX, post: 131210, member: 3861"] The more and more I look at my husband, the more and more I see my ex in the beginning. I [I]have[/I] gotten to the point where, if he told me he was leaving, I'd open the door. I've told him not to come home for things, such as, yelling at me for "complaining" and interrupting his time with his friends when he had gone out one night. I called him at 3am. He said I was being mean and he was in a convo, and got off the phone with me. I called between 4 and 4:30am (my legs were in wicked pain). I just wanted him to come home so I could take a bath (I was scared as I had fallen asleep in the tub for an hour last time). He wouldn't answer so, at 4:30, I told him to not give a #@$! somewhere else and don't come home. I locked the door and when he came home (of course) at 5:30am, he threatened to break the door open if I didn't open it for him. He made fun of me and told me I wasn't sick. It was all in my head. A little while later, he went to sleep. We tried counseling once (this is after I had threatened to leave). It was unsuccessful and would be surprised if my therapist could ever get our marriage to work. He said my husband seems to live in his own little world of "he's right", he's not integrated with the family, etc... I made another appointment 20 Mar, but that's a long time away. All of my friends who see us are leaning (heavily) towards control issues. They went as far as saying he's avoiding fixing my car, so I have to depend on him even more. I've explained that using ex's car would be best, since I wouldn't be seeing him. husband didn't care. It's his and he doesn't want me to have anything to do with him. Again, he'd rather I walk to my son's school, than use ex's car or get a ride from ex... Ex does pay support and, in fact, it is kind of deducted from what he owes me, for gas money. husband doesn't care, though. He can't believe he is just a "taxi" to me when I get rides from him. *sigh* I dunno... And for the record... Let's not be heartless here. I'll make a list of positives about husband: 1. Sometimes he gets me random presents from the stores he goes to (i.e. a bottle of pomegranate juice, a metal magazine rack for the bathroom, etc...). 2. About every other month, he'll take the kids out and let me sleep for a morning on the weekend. 3. He helps discipline difficult child, sometimes. Brain...shutting...down... I'm sorry. It's hard for me to think. I'll answer about difficult child as best I can and then I have to stop writing. My head's killing me. I've talked to difficult child's school many many times about their stupidity. I had to tell them, recently, that I can no longer drive, so they need to take it easy. Luckily, this has deterred them from demanding I go there everyday, but they still want me to come in for a meeting. Mind you, last time I went in to have a meeting with the principal and social worker, when i got there, the principal was on lunch duty and the social worker wasn't even in the school, anymore. lately, the principal's been telling me how they're going to look at the iep to do some things in that plan. what?! you're waiting 'til NOW to practice the plan?!?!?! *sigh* I'm so happy we're moving out of this town. I'm hoping it will be better for difficult child and not disrupt him to the point of acting out even more... [/QUOTE]
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