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husband inappropriate response?
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<blockquote data-quote="TerryJ2" data-source="post: 84582" data-attributes="member: 3419"><p>Wow. What a variety of responses. My head is spinning.</p><p></p><p>So, for the sake of argument :smile: assuming this is a co-dependent relationship, he's supposed to take care of his feelings and I'm supposed to take care of mine ... but how to express sympathy and even empathy with-o taking on the other person's stuff? </p><p></p><p>Klmno, do you see that we are both doing the same thing? Just curious, because I can't see anything right now!</p><p></p><p>In regard to not trusting him enough to tell him, my husband doesn't "Get it" and never will... I haven't posted anything specific, but heck, here goes ... my mom was an alcoholic and 3-4 nights a wk, we 5 kids were subjected to screaming, yelling, slamming doors, breaking things, sobbing, emotional scenes, getting no sleep (and consequently, falling asleep in class the next day) and a dad who told us to cooperate to "keep the peace." All of her emotions were legit. Ours were garbage. She needed help and didn't get it. Back in "Those Days" you never whispered a word to anyone about anything.</p><p></p><p>My husband's family swept everything under the rug. His parents didn't drink, they worked and did the corporate family thing. Everything was about education, intellect, and community service. If there was a serious issue at home, you ignored it. Everything was called a "chemical imbalance" and science would provide the answers. Period. </p><p></p><p>Imagine the two of us, married. What a combination! </p><p></p><p>Add a difficult child to that.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="TerryJ2, post: 84582, member: 3419"] Wow. What a variety of responses. My head is spinning. So, for the sake of argument [img]:smile:[/img] assuming this is a co-dependent relationship, he's supposed to take care of his feelings and I'm supposed to take care of mine ... but how to express sympathy and even empathy with-o taking on the other person's stuff? Klmno, do you see that we are both doing the same thing? Just curious, because I can't see anything right now! In regard to not trusting him enough to tell him, my husband doesn't "Get it" and never will... I haven't posted anything specific, but heck, here goes ... my mom was an alcoholic and 3-4 nights a wk, we 5 kids were subjected to screaming, yelling, slamming doors, breaking things, sobbing, emotional scenes, getting no sleep (and consequently, falling asleep in class the next day) and a dad who told us to cooperate to "keep the peace." All of her emotions were legit. Ours were garbage. She needed help and didn't get it. Back in "Those Days" you never whispered a word to anyone about anything. My husband's family swept everything under the rug. His parents didn't drink, they worked and did the corporate family thing. Everything was about education, intellect, and community service. If there was a serious issue at home, you ignored it. Everything was called a "chemical imbalance" and science would provide the answers. Period. Imagine the two of us, married. What a combination! Add a difficult child to that. [/QUOTE]
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