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<blockquote data-quote="JayPee" data-source="post: 757654" data-attributes="member: 23405"><p>I'm sorry you had a rough night. I still have difficulties myself. Setting and keeping boundaries are healthy but also are a very, very difficult thing to do. I found the quote that "New Leaf" posted one time that I refer to often.</p><p></p><p>"We have no control over another's choices and we can't "over-care" our loved ones into action. In other words, we can't care about their situations more than they do. That just continues to shift the consequences from them to us."</p><p></p><p>A lot of our suffering is our angst, anxiety, hurt and pain over wishing things were the way we wanted them to be. Sometimes, the plans for our loved ones don't even remotely resemble what we have envisioned for them and us. But if you have faith, trust and believe that maybe this difficult, troubled road they have to travel is exactly what they need in order to come through this journey of life on the "right side" of things.</p><p></p><p>We want things to turn around quickly because we want to experience peace, happiness and joy with our children but we need to realize the time it may take our children to get to a better place could be a whole life-time. In the meantime, we can't put our lives on hold, holding our breath until they are better. That's not fair to us. Learn to grow through this difficult experience. Make it worthwhile so that lives are not being wasted.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="JayPee, post: 757654, member: 23405"] I'm sorry you had a rough night. I still have difficulties myself. Setting and keeping boundaries are healthy but also are a very, very difficult thing to do. I found the quote that "New Leaf" posted one time that I refer to often. "We have no control over another's choices and we can't "over-care" our loved ones into action. In other words, we can't care about their situations more than they do. That just continues to shift the consequences from them to us." A lot of our suffering is our angst, anxiety, hurt and pain over wishing things were the way we wanted them to be. Sometimes, the plans for our loved ones don't even remotely resemble what we have envisioned for them and us. But if you have faith, trust and believe that maybe this difficult, troubled road they have to travel is exactly what they need in order to come through this journey of life on the "right side" of things. We want things to turn around quickly because we want to experience peace, happiness and joy with our children but we need to realize the time it may take our children to get to a better place could be a whole life-time. In the meantime, we can't put our lives on hold, holding our breath until they are better. That's not fair to us. Learn to grow through this difficult experience. Make it worthwhile so that lives are not being wasted. [/QUOTE]
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